No Russian Collusion Here

Because it’s German collusion instead.

Justice

German businessman charged over exports to Russian military – Prosecutors say a German businessman and an alleged accomplice have been charged over the delivery of machinery to a company linked to the Russian military in violation of European Union sanctions

Ihm wird vorgeworfen, zwischen 2016 und 2018 Werkzeugmaschinen im Wert von acht Millionen Euro an einen staatlichen Rüstungskonzern geliefert zu haben, der Raketensysteme für die russische Armee herstellt.

 

“Work Again?”

Is this German humor? In a British tabloid?

Germany

“Will Germany’s effective Covid strategy work again as it enters a second wave?” It didn’t work the first time, folks (they’re up to 7,000+ new infections a day now, and climbing). Even though the Germans, as Klassenbeste (best in class), did everything right. Right? Face masks, social distancing, etc.

It could almost make one think that these face masks don’t help.

“The first wave taught us that if politicians and scientists work together, they have more chance of beating this virus.”

Not Just The Italian Mafia

Any kind of international crime organization you want sees Germany’s justice system as a joke.

Mafia

Italian mafia sees German justice system as ‘a joke’ – The Italian mafia has hundreds of members in Germany pulling strings in the international drug trade. The latest major trial shows how lengthy legal procedures and lenient verdicts are no match for organized crime.

“Our prosecution system is a joke for mafia groups. In the mafia, they price this in — they expect to face trials and even convictions. But the penalties threatened in Germany are laughably mild. They’re not a deterrent. The mafia isn’t bothered by them.”

The German Population Is Declining?

It depends on who you’re counting in Germany – and their birth rates.

Germany

German population declines for first time in decade – Pandemic has caused a fall in net immigration in the first six months, federal data show.

Translation: The only population growth in Germany comes from those who are not German. And Germany is like Japan (below)? Sort of. Only the Japanese don’t let anyone into their country. Germans no longer have any control over who comes into theirs.

Germany has long been grappling with a Japanese-style combination of low birth rates, an ageing society and a stagnant population of working-age people, which economists say raises concerns about productivity, growth and public finances in the future.

Germany Tough Now On China?

Sure they are. And I’ve got some swamp land in Florida I can offer you for next to nothing.

China

The Germans are bought and they know it.

Merkel’s China Reset Is Mostly Hollow – As the engine of German export growth, the destination of $100 billion worth of German goods last year, and Germany’s biggest overall trading partner, China is not just a large and profitable market. Germans see China as the mechanism for sustaining the only prolonged era of domestic harmony their country has ever known.

German Of The Day: Weiblich

That means feminine. You know, like the German language?

Weiblich

Well, not quite yet.

Germany’s Interior Ministry has objected to draft legislation drawn up by the Justice Ministry that uses the feminine form for every reference to people. It argued on Monday that the result likely would be unconstitutional. In German, linguistic convention has long called for the masculine form of a word to be used as the default when referring to people of either sex, such as in legislation.

In der Bundespressekonferenz ergänzte ein Sprecher des Innenministeriums, die Formulierungen des Gesetzentwurfs hätten “bei formaler Betrachtung zur Folge, dass das Gesetz gegebenenfalls nur für Frauen oder Menschen weiblichen Geschlechts gilt und damit höchstwahrscheinlich verfassungswidrig wäre.”

Flatliners

Coronavirus mortality rates: Germans continue to keep not dropping like flies.

Flatliners

They forgot to add the panic level here though. It’s also still as flat as ever. At a much higher level, of course, but still.

Coronavirus digest: Germany mulls restrictions on traveling, partying – Chancellor Angela Merkel’s aide has called for restrictions on social gatherings and travel to deal with the rising number of COVID-19 cases. Germany has reported a surge in daily infections…

While the number of cases and deaths in Germany is lower than in many neighboring countries, the country has been reporting more than 4,000 daily cases since Thursday, the highest since April.

 

German Measles?

How racist is that? Next they’ll be calling it the Spanish Flu.

German

Or, heaven forbid, the China Virus (try googling that, you won’t find it).

Newly discovered viruses suggest ‘German measles’ jumped from animals to humans – The virus that causes rubella, or German measles, finally has company. Scientists had never identified close relatives of the virus, leaving it as the only member of its genus, Rubivirus. But with a report in this week’s issue of Nature, rubella has gained a family. One of its two newfound relatives infects bats in Uganda; the other killed animals from three different species in a German zoo and was found in wild mice living nearby as well.

“Now we know that every disease in the letters of the MMR vaccine has a zoonotic origin.”

German Of The Day: Laufbursche

That means errand boy.

Schroeder

An example would be Russian Putin critic Alexej Nawalny saying of ex-chancellor Gerhard Schroeder (SPD, head lobbyist for Gazprom AKA Gazprom Gerd): „Schroeder is an errand boy for Putin who protects murderers.”

“Schröder ist ein Laufbursche Putins, der Mörder beschützt.”

Number Of Germans Reporting In Sick Has Fallen To Dangerously Low Levels

This is a real German dilemma. How do you gracefully call in sick to stay home when you’re already home playing sick in the first place? OK, to avoid being sick. But still.

Sick

Coronavirus: Fewer Germans call in sick during pandemic – With many avoiding the doctor’s office and working from home during the coronavirus pandemic, the number of German workers reporting in sick has fallen to below average levels.

“After a record high at the end of March, the number of sick employees insured by TK dropped to a below-average level.”

PS: And this at a time when other folks refuse to call in sick when maybe they ought of sort of should.