German television style. I like this host.
He goes for the hottest hot sauce (minute 2:30) because he’s that cool and then has to have somebody else take over for him so they can drive him to the hospital.
Nachdem er sich an einem Stück Currywurst mit einer extrem scharfen Würzsauce versucht hatte, musste er die Moderation abbrechen. “Bild.de” berichtet, dass der 38-Jährige anschließend hinter der Bühne mit Kreislaufversagen zusammengebrochen sei und in ein Krankenhaus gebracht werden musste.
Well, in the real world… Not at all. But here in Germany…
Employment minister Andrea Nahles (SPD) wants to review the situation to see if an anti-stress law can be introduced. The number of stress-related illnesses continues to rise in this country.
If this wasn’t so funny it would be serious. The problem is that nobody who reads this here is laughing. That makes this much more serious than I thought. Which isn’t funny.
Die SPD und Gewerkschaften fordern erneut eine gesetzliche Anti-Stress-Verordnung. Kann gesetzlich geregelt werden, dass der Chef seine Mitarbeiter nicht anrufen darf?
“The fact that the person blurred out the face of the kid and didn’t get the UFO in the dead center of the video is what causes me to believe this is real.”
Most of them appear to be aliens from Planet Germany, however.
“Jemand aus dem All will uns hier etwas sagen.”
Still on an unnatural natural high after their nation’s recent World Cup championship victory over Argentina in Brazil, an overconfident team of German robots has lost miserably to Australia 5-1 in the RoboCup 2014 final.
Congratulations to the Rockem Sockem Socceroos. Those many long nights in the lab really paid off.
“Unfortunately, during the final, after our goalie saved an attempt, he fell over and while trying to get back up and in position we conceded the only goal during the entire competition.”
Died in the saddle, too.
Gripped with paranoia after the shocking discovery that German information is being intercepted by foreign intelligence services, German counter-espionage experts now demand that all future communication be done using spy-proof “typewriter” technology.
What is more, foreign intelligence services operatives operating in the country have discovered a list indicating that the “typewriter” is only the first new-old anti-spy technology to be introduced in Germany.
The list, taken from an unsupervised “typewriter” (non-electric) in the reception area of the Germany Foreign Ministry, indicates that a whole new wave of old technology is to be introduced in the coming months. Among them will be cassette and eight-track tapes, VCRs, Polaroid instant cameras, the Walkman, carousel slide projectors, ditto machines, Morse code and the abacus. Needles to say, the use of cell phones, microwave ovens and remote control for television will have to be verboten.
“Before I start using typewriters and burning notes after reading, I’d rather abolish the secret services.”
And she’s been running the show here in Germany for about 40 of those sixty years too, I think. But don’t call her Anti, I mean Aunti. Her real name is Mutti.
I’d wish you a happy birthday now, Frau Bundeskanzlerin, but Germans like you are very superstitious about doing that before the actual birthday takes place, so I won’t. But I’ll think it now anyway.
Das Talent der Angela Merkel, heraufziehende Chancen und Risiken zu erkennen und – ganz unabhängig von ihrer Überzeugung – opportun darauf zu reagieren, ist gut dokumentiert: beim nach Fukushima plötzlich betriebenen Atomausstieg, beim Ringen um Jean-Claude Juncker, als sie gleich mehrmals die Position wechselte, oder in der NSA-Affäre, in der sie zu Gunsten guter US-Beziehungen lange schwieg und auch angesichts der jüngsten Spionage-Skandale nur symbolisch handelt, um die Deutschen zu beruhigen.
Gerade die größten Erfolge der Kanzlerin bleiben bei einer derartigen Management-Methode unbesungen. Es sind jene Katastrophen, die nicht eingetreten sind, weil vorsichtiges, iteratives Agieren sie verhindert hat. Merkels größter Verdienst ist letztlich jene lang anhaltende Phase der Langeweile, an der Intellektuelle gerade wieder so lautstark leiden.
Speaking Of Siegerflieger…
These Flieger are dedicated to you, World Cup Champions of 2014!
The best team won. The first Europeans on South American soil, which takes some doing, and the first team here to stifle Messi while still discovering a route to goal themselves.
Observing Hermann 