Was This Bridge Built Using Heavy Metal?

Ozzy

Dresden – Metal fans must be cheering but everybody else is rubbing their eyes: Google Maps has turned the Waldschlößchenbrücke into Ozzy Osbourne Bridge!

Metal-Fans dürften jubeln, alle anderen werden sich die Augen reiben: Der Internet-Kartendienst Google Maps hat aus der Dresdner Waldschlößchenbrücke die Ozzy-Osbourne-Brücke gemacht!

Let The Pre-Sommerloch Activities Begin

Long before the official Sommerloch activities do, I mean.

Lotti

You know. The Sommerloch? That time of year in Germany when the people who manufacture the news are on vacation so the skeleton crew back at the office tries to make do by cranking out monster sightings? As in, if it wasn’t for fake news we wouldn’t have no news at all?

Anyways, Lotti the Turtle Monster herself is back from last summer. Even though she was never actually sighted even then, of course. The villagers or peasants in the area – some place called Irsee (Irrsinn means insanity, by the way, no connection) – have placed a trap for her and are hoping for the best. The best media coverage they can possibly squeeze out of this puppy. I mean turtle. Like in June already.

After all, there’s not much else going on in the news these days, is there? What else are Germans going to be interested in reading about?

Lotti wurde nie gesehen. Ob sie tatsächlich existierte oder die Irseer im vergangenen Sommer einem Phantom hinterher jagten, wird wohl nie geklärt werden.

This Is Supposed To Be News?

It’s never been any different.

Trust

A poll published by research firm infratest dimap last week indicates German trust in the U.S. has plummeted to lows not seen since the thick of the Iraq war. Another poll, published in May, showed those Germans surveyed were more interested in deepening their country’s ties with China than they were in doing so with the U.S. A third, published in April, showed that nearly half wanted Germany to take a “middle position” in the Ukraine conflict rather than standing firmly on the side of the West.

Maybe The Turks Could Build One Of These New-Fangled Airport Thingies In Berlin, Too

The construction of the world’s largest airport began on June 7 in Istanbul with a massive groundbreaking ceremony. When fully completed in 2018, the 10 billion-euro airport will be able to carry 150 million passengers a year, making it one of the world’s busiest airports.

Airport

Meanwhile, back in Germany…

Berlin’s disastrous airport project (groundbreaking so long ago nobody can remember anymore, at one time planned to open in June 2012 Anno Domini) was hit with another scandal after its technical director was suspended pending an investigation into alleged corruption. A “leading employee” responsible for awarding contracts during the on-going construction of the hopelessly-delayed Berlin Brandenburg airport (BER), is suspected of having demanded €500,000 bribes from a prospective contractor.

Berlin’s airport is already too small.

N S A B N D M O U S E

Who’s the leader of the club
That spies on you and me?
N S A B N D M O U S E!

BND

Germany’s foreign intelligence agency is officially lifting the lid on some of its worst-kept secrets by acknowledging that half a dozen facilities are in fact spy stations.

“Diese Aufgaben gehören zum Kernauftrag des Bundesnachrichtendienstes und beruhen auf gesetzlicher Grundlage. Zu diesen Aufgaben stehen wir, weshalb wir zukünftig auf die Legendierung dieser Außenstellen im Inland verzichten.”

Not Even German Astronauts Can Escape Tatort

A Soyuz spacecraft launched last night (May 28) from Baikonur cosmodrome in Kazakhstan docked with the International Space Station in the early hours of this morning. Onboard were ESA astronaut Alexander Gerst and his Expedition 40/41 crewmates, who will now live and work in space for the next six months…

Spiegel

And watch Tatort.

Der deutsche Astronaut Alexander Gerst (38) erlebt derzeit das, wozu viele Menschen wahrscheinlich nie die Möglichkeit haben werden: Als Bordingenieur arbeitet er nun für einige Monate auf der internationalen Raumstation ISS. Damit verbunden ist natürlich ein atemberaubender Bilck auf die Erde. Doch auf eines möchte der Raumfahrer während seiner Mission im All nicht verzichten: die “Tagesthemen” und den Tatort.

Bio Business Big Bad Business

Everybody buys Bio (organic) here. You know, like with real, non-organic money? It’s not just for the bio bourgeoisie anymore.

Bio

So don’t watch that there “Bio-Illusion” documentary on Arte if you can help it, folks. Not even if you can go back in time to yesterday to see it when it was on, I mean. Which you can’t, I bet.

Those who believe that organic farming is the work of some sinister food mafia will only be reinforced after watching the documentary “Bio-Illusion.” The others will be angry, with good reason.

Wo Bio draufsteht, muss noch längst nicht Bio drin sein.

PS: Speaking of the organic illusion, here’s another one for you here made in the US of A.

German Of The Day: Lebenslänglich

That means life-long, like in a life-long prison sentence?

Prison

That’s what this guy here got for killing that young woman there (and someone else not pictured), pretty much televised live. Actually, he got two life-long prison sentences. And that’s why he’s getting out of prison now because life-long in Germany, as in life-long prison sentence life-long, means 15 years and since he was sentenced in 1991 that means that, well, I dunno, he’s been in there a whole lot of years and it’s only fair that he be allowed to come out now, right?

Das Landgericht in Essen hatte die beiden Männer 1991 zu lebenslanger Haft verurteilt.