“Not Deployable For Collective Defense”

January 24, 2018 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: Armies, Bundeswehr, Defense, Exports, German, Germans, Germany, Industry, Military, NATO, Profit, Readiness, Responsibility, Weapons Exports 1 Comment

Three years ago, Germany’s military made headlines when it used broomsticks instead of machine guns during a NATO exercise because of a shortage of equipment. The lack of real weapons in the European Union’s most populous nation was seen as symptomatic of how underfunded its military has long been.

One Russian annexation later, if anything, the state of affairs has only gotten worse, according to the parliamentary commissioner for the country’s armed forces.

He has now reached the conclusion that the German military is virtually “not deployable for collective defense,” at the moment. Independent commissioner Hans-Peter Bartels also indicated in a recent interview that Germany was unprepared for the possibility of a larger conflict even though smaller operations abroad may still be possible.

Meanwhile… Rising exports, Turkish tanks fuel German arms sales debate.

Again: Germany’s army is an alibi army that will never be used for anything other than to make Germans feel better (less worse?) about being 1) pacifists while being at the same time 2) the world’s third largest weapons exporter. Remember this when the next demand for them to spend 2 percent GDP on their defense comes up and they start to fidget – and get away with not spending it again.

The Few, The Proud, The Ones Who Weep When Asked To Remove Their Piercings…

December 28, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria Tags: Army, Bundeswehr, Defense, German, Germans, Germany, Marines, Military, Reality Show, Reality TV, Recruitment, Recruits, YouTue 1 Comment

The German Marines.

“Perhaps these will be the hardest three months of their lives,” says a deep-voiced commentator during the opening credits of the show, against a dramatic backdrop of silhouettes of the recruits, who have attracted a strong following on social media.

Financed by the German army at a cost of €7.9m (£7m), the show, consisting of daily episodes of four to seven minutes, is an attempt by the German military, the Bundeswehr, to attract new soldiers at a time when their numbers, following the abolition of conscription six years ago, are at a historic low.

Gleich an Tag eins in der Kaserne bekommen die Rekruten dem Titel der ersten Doku-Folge gemäß einen „Kulturschock“. Sie müssen sich an die strengen Umgangsformen und typischen Gepflogenheiten bei der Bundeswehr gewöhnen.

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German Of The Day: Suboptimal

December 17, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Defense, Exports, German, Germans, Germany, NATO, Pacifism, Profit, Readiness 1 Comment

That means sub-optimal, of course. Somewhat less than perfect.

And, as reported earlier, that is the condition in which Germany’s mighty submarine fleet is currently in.

Abysmal Readiness – Indeed, the German military, which transitioned to being a purely volunteer force in 2011, has struggled to fill its ranks, and has sought to appeal to young recruits with more flexible hours, cozier barracks and childcare facilities. A recent publicity campaign featured one of the female sailors serving aboard a U-Boat, which commentators have pointed out would be impossible now due to the entire fleet being grounded.

Exports of these babies, however, couldn’t be doing better. You do the math. You know, just do a little sub-traction.

Germany’s low levels of defense spending in the post–Cold War era reflect a commendable wariness toward using military force after the atrocities committed by Nazi Germany in World War II. However, as the state with the greatest wealth, population and political clout in the European Union, it will be expected to contribute more to European defense as Moscow presents a more aggressive posture in eastern Europe.

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Promise?

December 6, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Helplessness, Hideology, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Allies, Defense, Foreign Policy, Gabriel, German, Germans, Germany, Independence, NATO, Politics, SPD, Trump, USA Leave a comment

Do you promise that “relations with the US will never be the same after Trump?”

Because that would be great if you made sure that was the case, German Foreign Minister Gabriel (SPD). And I couldn’t agree more with what you just said in that context; that Germany needs to be more confident about defending it’s own interests and draw red lines where it needs to draw red lines. Germany first? By all means. It’s not the most original idea but we can all see where you’re coming from. Stay tuned, everyone.

Deutschland müsse künftig selbstbewusster seine Interessen vertreten, verlangt Gabriel. “Wir müssen selbst unsere Positionen beschreiben und notfalls rote Linien ziehen – unter Partnern, aber an unseren eigenen Interessen orientiert.”

German Of The Day: Unfassbar

November 16, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Bundeswehr, Defense, German, Germans, Germany, Tanks 4 Comments

That means unfathomable or mind-boggling. And, well, actually, it isn’t.

Not at all. It is in fact not in the least unfathomable that of the 244 Leopard II tanks the Bundeswehr has at its disposal (244 tanks for an entire army?) only 95 of them are acutally, well, disposable. That’s, uh – let me do the math here – less than half.

What was I saying the other day about Germany living in a parallel universe (comments)? Do you believe me now?

Please note: These are also the same tanks that are Exportschlager. Another German word. This one meaning export hits. See how it all fits together (not)?

“Das ist unfassbar.”

German Of The Day: PESCO

November 13, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy Tags: Defense, EU, Europe, German, Germans, Germany, Language, Military, NATO, PESCO 2 Comments

That’s actually English and stands for Permanently Stalled Cooperation, I think. It is the EU’s attempt to move closer to having permanent joint European armed forces.

But they’ll never manage this, of course. Most European nations don’t even live up to their NATO obligations right now.

Seit vielen Jahren ringen die Europäer um eine gemeinsame Verteidigungspolitik, der Erfolg war bisher äußerst überschaubar. Das aber könnte sich nun ändern: Am Montag haben die Außen- und Verteidigungsminister von 23 der 28 EU-Staaten dem Europäischen Rat mitgeteilt, in der Verteidigung künftig gemeinsame Wege zu gehen. Zumindest vorerst nicht dabei: Dänemark, Irland, Portugal, Malta – und natürlich Großbritannien, das ohnehin die EU verlassen will.

PS: Is she sexually harassing those guys up there?

What The SPD Stands For

August 10, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, Hypocrisy Tags: Defense, Docial Democrats, Elections, German, Germans, Germany, NATO, Social Democracy, SPD 3 Comments

Stop Paying for Defense, for one thing.

It’s election time, you see. And Germans like to pretend they are pacifists (as the world’s third largest weapons exporter). So the SPD, once again, is going to take an unpopular stand (not) and rule out their country’s obligation to meet NATO’s two percent defense spending target – a target the Germans agreed to years ago and still refuse to meet. You’ve got to have backbone in politics.

The parliamentary leader of Germany’s Social Democratic Party (SPD) rejected NATO’s 2 percent of GDP defense spending target and called for strategic investment in the German armed forces in an interview published Thursday.

“We think this is the wrong way, and with the SPD in the government there will be no such thing.”

It’s Not Just About The Two Percent We Promised To Spend On Defense As A NATO Country

May 25, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Brussels, Defense, Defense Spending, Merkel, NATO, Trump Leave a comment

And still aren’t spending (1.3 percent the last time I checked), Angela Merkel explained to Donald Trump.

It’s also about “what a country makes available to NATO and what capabilities we have,” whatever that means. The Oktoberfest and world class table tennis talent or what?

Citing this week’s attack in the English city of Manchester, Trump told fellow alliance leaders including German Chancellor Angela Merkel that NATO should focus its efforts on combating terrorism. Yet of the 28 member nations, 23 “are still not paying what they should be paying and what they’re supposed to be paying for their defense,” he said.

“Wir freuen uns auch, dass in Zukunft nicht nur gefragt wird, wie viel wird für Verteidigung ausgegeben, sondern auch, was stellt man als Land der Nato zur Verfügung, welche Fähigkeiten haben wir und welche Beiträge leisten wir. Ich glaube hier kann sich Deutschland sehen lassen, und das werde ich auch hier deutlich machen.”

But Germany Would Defend Its NATO Allies If US-Amerika Attacked

May 24, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking Tags: Defense, German, Germans, Germany, NATO, Polls, Russia, Surveys Leave a comment

This just in: Majority of Germans wouldn’t support defending NATO allies in Russia conflict. Why doesn’t that surprise anybody?

According to the US think tank, which interviewed people in European countries, the US and Canada, “NATO’s image is improving on both sides of the Atlantic.” The Alliance enjoys high approval ratings in Poland and the Netherlands (both on 79%). Germany ranks third in the list on 67%, followed by Canada (66%), the US and United Kingdom (both 62%), France (60%) and Spain (45%)…

The results showed that Germany would support military intervention by NATO less than any other country. Only 40% of respondents would back military support for a partner in “serious military conflict” with Russia.

Auch in Deutschland stehen die meisten Befragten hinter der Allianz – bei einem Konflikt mit Russland würde jedoch nur eine Minderheit ein Partnerland verteidigen.

Bundeswehr CIS

April 6, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Home Cooking Tags: Bundeswehr, CIS, Cyber Attacks, Defense, German, Germans, Germany, Hackers Leave a comment

No, not CIS as in Crininal Investigative Service. That’s CIS as in Cyber and Information Space Command.

That’s the name of Germany’s new “cyber commando” group, some 260 crack nerd troops who have now begun defending their country against cyber attacks (over 284,000 such attacks were registered during the first nine weeks of this year alone, according to the German defense ministry). As soon as they get funding for computers and other cyber stuff like that, that is (this is the Bundeswehr after all).

IT specialists have cast doubt over the ability of the Bundeswehr as currently configured to keep up: its procurement processes are notoriously slow, for example. It will need to show itself to be much more flexible and agile in future.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

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