Category Archives: Hurt Feelings

German Happiness Hits Record High And Sure The Hell Better Stop Soon

March 21, 2017 By in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Because, you know, the happy Germans are really starting to piss off the regular, less-than-happy-silent-majority ones (see happy Germans below).

Happy

A new study shows that Germans are more satisfied with their lives now than at any point since reunification in 1990. The research by the German Institute for Economic Research Friday showed that life satisfaction among Germans had hit 7.5 out of ten on their happiness scale. The DIW has interviewed 30,000 people each year since 1984 on a variety of themes including work situation, health, education and income to understand how Germans are doing in their lives.

“It is sobering to see that satisfaction among east Germans still trails that of west Germans after all these years, but at the same time, the gap is smaller now than it has ever been.”

Forbidden Terrorist Organization?

March 19, 2017 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

So much for Verbote (bans) in Germany.

PKK

On the one hand, nobody has any problem refusing to let Turkish ministers hold pro-government rallies here, but when the outlawed Kurdistan Workers Party (PKK) organizes a demonstration with 30,000 protestors carrying their banned party symbols, that ain’t no big deal, either.

How could Erdogan and Co. possibly think that there is a double standard being applied here, right? Wow. Do the Germans really think that this is going to contribute in helping to bring Erdogan under control? Erdogan wins big with this one.

Die PKK ist in Deutschland seit 1993 als Terrororganisation verboten. Erst vor kurzem hatte die Bundesregierung das PKK-Verbot ausgeweitet und auch das öffentliche Zeigen von Öcalan-Porträts untersagt.

The German Renewable Energy Revolution Is Not Only Expensive

March 17, 2017 By in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hideology, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , Leave a comment

It. like, doesn’t “work.”

Money isn’t everything when it comes to renewable energy here. It has to effectively cut greenhouse gas emissions, too.

Energy

Or it ought to. That is, maybe it could at one point but isn’t doing so quite yet. It will one day, though. Honest. We hope.

Germany’s carbon dioxide emissions rose by 4m tonnes to 906m tonnes, an increase of 0.7 per cent, according to a study by Arepo Consult carried out for the opposition Green party.

The Greens said the figures meant it would become “even harder” for Germany to attain its declared goal of reducing greenhouse gas by 40 per cent by 2020 compared with 1990 levels

Childless Chancellor Concerned About German Reproduction Rate

March 16, 2017 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , 2 Comments

Distraught by her countrywomen’s rotten reproduction record, childless German Chancellor Angela Merkel has called an emergency demography strategy summit in Berlin.

Population

“What’s with these Luschen (duds)?” The cranky chancellor asked her clueless ministers. “I mean, this isn’t rocket science we’re talking about here. Don’t they, you know, show them films and stuff at school about this, you know, kind of thing? Even I’ve seen films like that, you know. Once, I think.”

I think Germany is below average in terms of the help provided to young people. And Germany is certainly below average in the attitude that women with children should not work. In most countries it was like that 50 years ago but not today. That is just very detrimental to fertility.

Germany Really Pissed Off At Twitter Now

March 15, 2017 By in Habeas Corpus, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Tired of being called Nazialmanya by unidentified Twitter-types, the nation of Germany is now moving forward at full speed to punish Twitter ITSELF for allowing such reprehensible name calling to take place.

Nazialamanya

“As a country, I have feelings, too,” said the federal parliamentary republic in central-western Europe. “And you can bet that I’m going to see to it that not cleaning up certain types of hate speech like pronto-or-practically-immediately-already will be criminalized because, well, just about everything else here that has not been expressly permitted has already been criminalized, too. So there.”

Hundreds of Twitter accounts from media outlets to celebrities including popstar Justin Bieber, were hacked Wednesday, branded with the Turkish flag and messages being sent out in Turkish.

You Say You Want A Revolution?

March 14, 2017 By in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , Leave a comment

An energy revolution? Then pay up front, Germany. It’s going to cost you a zillion dollars and you may not be able to come up with the cash for it later.

Germany

Germany spent 25 billion euros ($26 billion) on renewable energy in 2016, most of which—23 billion euros—consumers paid through a surcharge on their electricity bills. The rise in that surcharge is the single biggest reason that the amount the average German household spent on electricity rose to 1,060 euros in 2016, up 50% from 2007.

German Of The Day: Schwein gehabt

March 12, 2017 By in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , 1 Comment

“Having pig” means got lucky, or you had a lucky break.

Essen

Two arrested after Germany shuts down shopping mall over fears of terrorist attack.

The sources said a German man who traveled to Syria to fight alongside the group was the suspected mastermind. He had reportedly been in contact with a number of people in the Essen area to organize the attack, and had also sent them bomb-making instructions via an online chat.

Your Fifteen Minutes Are Up, Martin

March 10, 2017 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , Leave a comment

According to Andy Warhol, as you all know: “In the future, everyone will be a popular German chancellor candidate for 15 minutes.” So you can move on now, Martin Schulz (SPD). You’ve done your time.

Schulz

In the latest poll taken by ZDF-Politbarometer, 44 percent of those asked said they would support Martin Schulz for chancellor in the coming election. The same number would also support Angela Merkel, however. Last month the numbers were 49 percent for Schulz and 38 percent for Merkel.

Im ZDF-Politbarometer sprechen sich bei der Frage, wen man nach der Bundestagswahl lieber als Kanzler oder Kanzlerin hätte, jetzt 44 Prozent für Merkel und ebenfalls 44 Prozent Schulz aus. Vergangenen Monat hatte der SPD-Mann mit 49 Prozent noch einen deutlichen Vorsprung vor der Amtsinhaberin, die nur auf 38 Prozent kam.

Berlin Doesn’t Need A New Airport After All

March 9, 2017 By in Hard Facts, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , 2 Comments

You know, the new one that still hasn’t opened yet and perhaps never will? No. Berlin is already number one when it comes to airports. So let’s move on already, people.

Airports

1.  Berlin Schönefeld Airport (SXF) in Deutschland
2.  London Luton Airport (LTN) in Großbritannien
3.  New York LaGuardia Airport (LGA) in den USA
4.  New York J. F. Kennedy Airport (JFK) in den USA
5.  Brüssel Charleroi Airport (CRL) in Belgien
6.  Lima International Airport (LIM) in Peru
7.  Rom Ciampino Airport (CIA) in Italien
8.  Berlin Tegel Airport (TXL) in Deutschland
9.  Paris Charles De Gaulle Airport (CDG) in Frankreich
10. Paris Orly Airport (ORY) in Frankreich

Sure, this is a list of the world’s worst airports (according to a survey taken by eDreams), but still. Both of Berlin’s airports under the top ten. Nice try New York and Paris but toodaloo muddafrika…

Zwei deutsche Flughäfen unter den Top 10.

Turks Kick Off New Tourism Campaign To Lure Germans To Turkey By Calling Them Nazis

March 8, 2017 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: , , , , 2 Comments

Its tourism sector taking a real battering this year for some inexplicable reason, Turkish authorities are now attempting to lure German tourists to Turkey by calling them Nazis.

Turkey

“Please come visit our beautiful country, you Nazi swine,” a representative of President Recep Tayyip Erdogan said yesterday in Berlin. “You are the infidel scum of the earth worthy to be put to a horrible death by slow roasting and will enjoy to the fullest our fascinating culture, stunning beaches and helpful, friendly personnel, all at an unbeatable low price.”

At the ITB fair in Berlin, 132 Turkish companies under the auspices of the Turkish Culture and Tourism Ministry will have the chance to promote the campaign.