Category Archives: Hurt Feelings

German Couple Waits Days To Be Offended By Naked Neighbor Using His Sauna

July 6, 2016 By in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

Butt naked. In Germany of all places. The nerve. Is nothing sacred?

Neighbors

In the latest example of the German habit of seeking legal rulings on the tiniest details of every day life, a man has won a case over the right to walk to the sauna in his garden in the altogether.

The 42-year-old, named only as Robert B under German privacy laws, installed a private sauna in his garden in Dortmund.

In common with most Germans, Robert B liked to take his sauna naked, and didn’t bother covering up on his way to and from the house, despite the fact he could be clearly seen from the next door garden.

His neigbour, named only as Hans L, was sufficiently offended at the sight to seek legal redress, and initially won a court order for Robert B to cover up.

But Robert B appealed against the decision, and this week succeeded in securing his right to parade around his garden in a state of undress.

Die Rechtslage war bisher nicht eindeutig. Infrage kommt § 118 des Ordnungswidrigkeitengesetzes. Darin heißt es: “Ordnungswidrig handelt, wer eine grob ungehörige Handlung vornimmt, die geeignet ist, die Allgemeinheit zu belästigen oder zu gefährden und die öffentliche Ordnung zu beeinträchtigen.”

This Is Not A Fake News Item

July 5, 2016 By in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , 2 Comments

I just don’t get this stuff anymore. Are these people only confused or just plain stupid?

Confused

A young left-wing German politician has admitted she lied to police about the racial background of three men who raped her in case it triggered reprisals against refugees in her country.

Selin Gören, the national spokeswoman of the left-wing youth movement Solid, was attacked by three men in January in the city of Mannheim where she works as a refugee activist.

The 24-year-old was ambushed late at night in a playground where she said she was forced to perform a sex act on her attackers.

After the assault she went straight to the police – but she did not tell them the ethnic make-up of the men, that they were speaking Arabic or Farsi.

Eine junge Frau wird vergewaltigt und sagt es niemandem. Der Grund: Die Täter waren Männer mit arabischer Herkunft. Sie wollte den Rassismus nicht weiter befeuern.

German Of The Day: Starrsinnig

July 4, 2016 By in Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , 1 Comment

That means stubborn or obstinate.

Starrsinnig

Merkel, Juncker und Schulz – das starrsinnige Trio

When looking to find the guilty parties for Brexit, most of the British who voted to remain in the EU are quick to name the three names of Martin Schulz, Jean-Claude Juncker and, above all, Angela Merkel. These EU advocates are convinced that the vote would have turned out completely different if these three had only shown a modicum of understanding for David Cameron’s urgent wish to submit a reform treaty to the British voters that would have deserved the name. This did not happen, however. And thus the obstinate trio frivolously created the basis for Britain’s turning away from the EU. Now the parliament is in an an uproar.

Bei der Suche nach den Schuldigen für den Brexit nennen die meisten derjenigen Briten, die für den EU-Verbleib stimmten, die Namen Martin Schulz, Jean-Claude Juncker und vor allem Angela Merkel. Die EU-Befürworter sind davon überzeugt, dass das Votum gänzlich anders ausgefallen wäre, wenn diese drei nur ein Fünkchen echtes Verständnis für David Camerons dringenden Wunsch aufgebracht hätten, den britischen Wählern einen Reformvertrag vorzulegen, der diese Bezeichnung verdient. Das geschah aber nicht. So schuf das starrsinnige Trio leichtfertig die Voraussetzung für die britische Abkehr von der EU. Jetzt ist das Parlament in Aufruhr.

Good Question

June 30, 2016 By in Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , 1 Comment

Could Germans vote to exit the EU?

Dexit

In a word, no.

Germans could only vote on exiting the EU if they first change their constitution to include such “direct democracy” at the national level. Only then could the Berlin government or parliament call a referendum.

Now isn’t that convenient. You’re not asked if you want in, you’re  not asked about anything while you’re in and you couldn’t even ask to leave if you wanted to. So like why even ask?

And besides, what would you call the damned thing? A Dexet? A Gerexit? It just doesn’t have the right Klang.

Germany’s More Democracy organization has long called for making possible popular national referendums in the country. On its website, the group argues that the government merely presents “politics without any alternative” which parliament then “nods through.”

US-Amerikan Election To Be Closely Monitored

June 29, 2016 By in Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , 1 Comment

Still reeling from the shock of Great Britain’s incorrect Brexit vote, the European and international community is now extremely worried that the result of the coming American presidential election might also not turn out as desired.

Trump

That is why the so-called “Initiative HERSELF,” spearheaded and financed by Germany (representing all the worried Europeans), Russia, China, North Korea and Cuba, intends to intensify its efforts in educating the clueless American public in matters of civic responsibility and to warn them of the unspeakable dangers that must occur should they not vote for this election cycle’s fashionable, gender-free candidate, Mrs. William Jefferson Clinton (no one would ever vote for a presidential candidate based on the color of his skin or the type of sex organ she has, you know – or vice versa – or the color of the sex organ, for that matter).

The initiative also calls for increasing by five the number of OSCE election monitors observing said election over there in the freakin’ United States of America because everybody knows about this country’s widespread and systematic voting fraud issues. We’re watching you, Amerika.

Die Organisation für Sicherheit und Zusammenarbeit in Europa (OSZE) will die Zahl ihrer Wahlbeobachter bei der bevorstehenden Präsidentschaftswahl in den USA verfünffachen.

Germany Planning To Unveil Secret Hell-Freezing-Over Device

June 28, 2016 By in Habitudes, Helplessness, Hideology, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

They must be. Otherwise they wouldn’t be so delusional about thinking that they could ever have the bittiest little chance of getting a permanent seat on the UN Security Council.

UN

I don’t know what German foreign minister Frank-Walter Steinmeier (SPD) has been smoking these past few days but he has certainly been on a roll. This is the same guy, mind you, who just accused the NATO of warmongering by staging military exercises in support of its eastern NATO members (they appear to be concerned about some other types of exercises being carried out by another way big non-NATO country just a bit further down the road).

And now he thinks that a toothless, nay-saying nation like Germany somehow has the right to determine policy in the body that is at least nominally charged with the maintenance of international peace and security? Like I said. It must be some really good stuff.

Steinmeier, an honor graduate from the Neville Chamberlain Institute of Applied Appeasement, now specializes in mistaking cause and effect and is also branching out into the popular field of abandoning worried NATO neighbor countries in the East.

EU Threatens To Toss Great Britain Out Of The EU If It Has Not Packed Up Its Bags And Left By Tuesday

June 26, 2016 By in Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , 1 Comment

Or at the very least handed in its official resignation thingy by then, that is.

President

The unelected President of the European Parlament, Dingsda (what’s his name) is mad as hell at this Brexit Scheiß (crap) and isn’t going to take it anymore. After Great Britain’s sovereign decision to leave the EU last week he now demands that Great Britain leave the EU. If it does not do so immediately, he says, the EU will have no other choice but to toss Great Britain out of the EU. This is of course something that none of us want to do, he added, except for maybe Great Britain, that is, but believe you me we will do so anyway if we are forced to. Honest. So watch out already we mean business.

Der Präsident des Europaparlaments, Martin Schulz, sagte der “Bild am Sonntag”, der Gipfel am kommenden Dienstag sei hierfür der geeignete Zeitpunkt.

Is Nothing Sacred?

June 21, 2016 By in Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , 1 Comment

Talk about crossing a red line. Now all bets are off, people.

Nudists

The influx of more than 1m migrants has already divided Germany. But the latest row casts it as a threat to the very heart of German culture: the right to walk around in public in the nude.

Nudists at a club near the historic town of Meissen were incensed when they received new rules from the local authority suggesting they would not be allowed to swim naked in the local lake where they have been skinny-dipping for over a century.

Neues aus Absurdistan. “Wir bewegen uns seit 1905 nackt im Gelände.”

German Of The Day: Arbeitslos

June 20, 2016 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

That means unemployed. You know, like this loser of a European Football Championship koala oracle at the Leipzig Zoo?

Koala

„Oobi-Ooobi’s” job was to predict the outcome of the German team’s soccer matches and after two big flops in a row they fired his furry Australian ass. Dumb animal You have to perform over here in this part of the world, pal. And there is no such thing as free eucalyptus.

„Der unparteiische Australier zieht die Konsequenzen aus seinen beiden falschen Tipps. Als sportlich fairer Verlierer überlässt er das Orakeln ab sofort den Anderen.“