German Of The Day: Majestätsbeleidigung

That means a slight or an insult against a sovereign majesty-type person (lèse majesté).

Law

You know, the crime German comedian Jan Böhmermann recently committed against the Top Sultan What’s in Charge in Turkey? In the year 2016, I mean?

Anyways, this law, paragraph 103, is still on the books here in Germany and Hamburg’s justice minister has decided to go way out on the limb here and give it a shot and see if he could maybe sort of like get rid of this ridiculous piece of legislation already. It would be a big step forward into the unknown and all that, of course, but I, for one, am convinced that German civilization will be able to handle it.

Die Justizbehörde geht davon aus, dass das Gesetz noch vor der Sommerpause gestrichen werden könnte und das Verfahren gegen Böhmermann dann eingestellt werden müsste. Davon unberührt blieben jedoch Ermittlungen gegen Böhmermann wegen Beleidigung nach Paragraf 185 Strafgesetzbuch.

DiscrimiNation

Get it? Nation?

Discrimination

And you thought you had it bad where you live (and of course you do) but here in Germany one out of every three Germans gets discriminated against regularly.

That’s right. Germans just don’t like Germans and they refuse to treat them fairly. They treat them like second-class citizens, which, in a way, well, they are. But so are the other two-thirds so why just pick them out to be treated like Dreck (dirt) like that? It just ain’t fair.

And the latest numbers (see the graph in the article) show that Germans get treated like Dreck whether it is at work or at play or while shopping or over at the courthouse or in the hospital or at school or in the media or even on the Internet. Like right here, for example. They just don’t get no respect.

But don’t worry because these Germans have had it up to here and are now going to start taking each and every one of each other to court about this, without discrimination. I mean indiscriminately.

“Es muss endlich möglich sein, Betroffene vor Gericht effektiv zu unterstützen – wie es in vielen anderen europäischen Ländern längst möglich ist.”

Apartheid Introduced In Germany

Or a form of it has begun creeping in, I should say. Which is creepy enough.

Apartheid

Only this type of apartheid is different. It is the kind practiced in the Muslim world.

Germans, famously open to the influx of strange, new cultural practices and the introduction of bizarre and foreign social customs in their country, have decided to take the initiative and beat their ever-growing Muslim population to the draw, so-to-speak, by establishing the system of gender segregation so popular in the Muslim world today (and soon to be introduced in your country, too).

This move is due, in part, to the fear German women now have of the countless Muslim male refugees who have entered their country in a thoroughly chaotic and uncontrolled manner although of course no one here is actually allowed to say that, you see (I’m not from here).

And how has the ice been broken? Private German rail operator MRB has introduced the country’s first women-only compartments on its service between Leipzig and Chemnitz. This may be a small step for segregation, but it is a giant leap for Islamkind.

In doing so, by the way, MRB and others have gone out of their way to stress that this is “not a response to Cologne attacks.” But what else are they going to say? If you tell folks the real reason you might hurt somebody’s feelings. And that would be cruel. And very unusual.

“We can’t put these ladies in a separate box and expect the bigger problem to vanish.”

Girls Just Want To Have Fun

German prosecutors have said a 15-year-old girl who stabbed a police officer was conducting a “martyrdom operation” for the militant “Islamic State” (IS) group. The teen had previously met with IS members in Turkey.

Terror

I’m sure she’ll be punished harshly for her actions. By German standards, I mean.

Meanwhile, when it comes to more serious crimes like free speech… I mean serious things like thought crimes…

German Chancellor Angela Merkel announced Friday that her government will grant a Turkish request for the prosecution of Jan Boehmermann after he recited a crude poem about Turkey’s president, despite “diverging opinions” within the German ruling coalition.  

“We are Germans, renowned for our world-famous sense of humor.”

German Of The Day: Fiasko

That means fiasco. You know, like the state-ordained Energiewende?

Wind

Berlin likes to think of itself as a green-energy example to the rest of the world. It sure is.

It makes you wonder if there’s any form of energy-price signal that governments won’t ignore. Germany’s 16-year-old Energiewende, or energy transformation, already has wrecked the country’s energy market in its quest to wean the economy off fossil fuels and nuclear power. Traditional power plants, including those that burn cleaner gas, have been closing left and right while soaring electricity prices push industries overseas and bankrupt households. Job losses run to the tens of thousands.

But now Berlin is going to fix all of this – again.

Derzeit gehe der Ausbau zu schnell und werde zu erheblichen Mehrkosten bei der Umlage zur Ökostrom-Förderung führen.

Veil, What Will They Think Of Next?

Veiling German women? What a tremendous waste of natural resources that would be.

Veils

German Justice Minister Heiko Maas (SPD) said the move to ban ads which “reduce women or men to sexual objects” is an attempt to create a “modern gender image”.

The important thing to note here folks are the three letters S, P and D. Support for Germany’s Social Democratic party has now slumpted to an all-time historical-like low (around 20 percent). But now, at the very latest, we at least understand why.

The plan has been called political correctness gone mad by its critics, who said it was the first step towards a “nanny state”. It comes following a controversy over claims made by a senior politician that schools and canteens in Germany are ‘banning’ the serving of pork to avoid offending Muslim migrants.

“To demand the veiling of women or taming of men, is something known among radical Islamic religious leaders, but not from the German minister of justice.”

Germans Don’t Need Foreign Leaders Telling Them How Far Free Speech Can Go

They have there own leaders to do that.

Erdogan

It is illegal under Section 103 of Germany’s criminal code to insult foreign leaders, you see.

So that is why German officials are now “carefully reviewing” the Turkish government’s request to have criminal proceedings be brought against German comedian Jan Boehmermann over his satirical poem suggesting that Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan engages in sexual acts with goats.

Wait a minute. Shouldn’t the goats be the insulted ones here? Hardy, har, har. Just joking. Honest, man.

Dass beleidigende Äußerungen hingegen überhaupt strafbar sind, versteht sich keinesfalls von selbst – in Ländern mit angloamerikanischer Rechtsordnung sind sie es ganz überwiegend nicht.

German Soldiers To Put Even More Blitz In Blitzkrieg

They have to. No more overtime will be allowed during regular wartime hours so get ‘er done quick, men. I mean persons.

Overtime

The German military, once the most feared fighting force in Europe, is being forced to lay down its weapons by restrictive new overtime limits.

German soldiers taking part in a four-week Nato exercise in Norway earlier this year had to leave after just 12 days because they had gone over their overtime limits, it has emerged…

Under the latest reforms, in force since January, the military working week has been reduced to 41 hours and troops can no longer be paid for working overtime.

Stell dir vor, es ist Krieg, und die Bundeswehr muss Überstunden abbauen.

It’s Magic

Wow. The refugees have suddenly stopped coming to Germany. Just like that.

Refugees

All it took, the German government (and government media) tell us today, was Angela Merkel’s strong leadership and the EU’s agreement with Turkey to return migrants who cross the Aegean Sea to Europe illegally. Well…

Most experts, however, say the deal with Turkey, the main plank of German Chancellor Angela Merkel’s plan to reduce refugee flows to Europe, had nothing to do with the fall in numbers since it has only been implemented for a few days. Rather, they say the decrease is mainly due to the closure of national borders by countries on the migrants’ Balkan route, a policy Ms. Merkel has vehemently opposed.

That’s right. This is the same German government (and government media) that said that putting stringent border controls in place wouldn’t and couldn’t solve the problem. So I guess, well, uh… Go ahead. You do the math.

Once again: Thanks, Austria. Sometimes – even in ze Europe – just making things happen is the best way to go.

Flüchtlinge: Zahlen sinken drastisch

Speaking Of State Control…

There may not be any punishment here for producing awful television shows but if YOU get sassy and don’t pay your GEZ TV tax (or “mandatory fee,” as the tax collectors prefer to call it) you can go to jail.

GEZ

I’m not making this up. All German households must shell out 17.50 euros ($20) a month to watch great entertainment like Traumshiff, Lindenstrasse and Tatort, Tatort, Tatort as well as be submitted to propagandistic-indoctrination-like nightly news programs à la the Tagesschau by those good old fashioned unelected and nameless state TV official folks over there at the ARD and the ZDF (exhale now). Or else.

A woman was freed from prison after a court in Chemnitz had admitted that they had kept her in custody for 61 days because of her refusal to pay the GEZ fees.

Regional state broadcaster MDR applied for an arrest warrant against Sieglinde Baumert in September 2015 in an attempt to force her to sign a statement about her assets, which she refused because, as she told “Die Welt” newspaper, “With my signature I would confirm the legality of the mandatory fees.”

“I feel patronized, I get the decision taken away from me about what I’m paying my money for.”