Somebody Call The Tradition Commission!

December 31, 2017 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Oh, they’ve contacted you already? Good. Whew.

Lead

Tradition can be a dangerous thing, folks. Just look at the old German New Year’s Eve custom of Bleigießen – telling fortunes by the shapes made when molten lead is dropped into cold water. Awful. As you can well imagine, countless millions have been maimed or died in the process. And did you know that they actually do this without proper supervision in the privacy of their own homes?

Thank goodness the EU is here to help. A new European Union directive has finally been enacted that prohibits this dangerous practice once and for all. Tonight will be the last time Germans will be allowed to recklessly place their lives and the lives of their children in danger.

This kind of stuff gets me right here. I really get emotional. Today the lead, tomorrow Santa Claus. The EU marches on.

Happy New Year!

Bye, bye, Blei: Im Zuge der neuen Chemikalienverordnung der EU müssen die Deutschen ab 2018 auf das Bleigießen an Silvester verzichten.

PS: Remember to be extra careful with those Polish firecrackers tonight, people.

P.

December 30, 2017 By in Hotness Tags: Leave a comment

Beautiful German of the week.

Polizei

Because somebody has to admire them. Funny, this kind of Gesichtsverhüllung doesn’t bother me.

PS: As seen on Twitter… The hyperbolthalamus is responsible https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/759327 for the progressive brain’s steady production of liberal hype, alarmist rhetoric and hysterical doomsday forecasting.
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Signs Of The Times?

December 29, 2017 By in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hostility, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

Signs of the times. At least here in Germany. Three stories popped up all in my face today. Made me wonder about this and that. And the other thing, too.

1) Germany’s main Staatsfunk news channel ARD originally failed to report the killing of a fifteen-year old German girl by her fifteen-year old Afghan ex-boyfriend.

ARD

When pressed for an explanation, mind police management explained that they don’t usually cover murders having to do with relationships. OK. If you say so. But do you honestly believe that this would have been the case if she had killed him?

2) Berlin’s Green justice minister wants to see that Berlin’s civil servant teacher, police and judge ladies are allowed to wear hijabs (headscarves) on duty. And this despite a recent court ruling to the contrary. Damn. Next year the Greens will most likely be passing legislation to force these women to wear them, I figure.

3) Police in North Rhine-Westphalia are warning German women to go out in groups during New Year’s Eve celebrations this year, not alone. Think Cologne. Remember Cologne and elsewhere way back when?

What, me wonder? Hell yeah, me wonder. But not really. No, to be perfectly honest. Not anymore.

“Gutmenschen verkennen die politische Brisanz des Kopftuchstreits.”

PS: As seen on Twitter… The hyperbolthalamus is responsible https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/759327 for the progressive brain’s steady production of liberal hype, alarmist rhetoric and hysterical doomsday forecasting.
#fun #books #99c #sale #ebook #humor #scifi #romance

The Few, The Proud, The Ones Who Weep When Asked To Remove Their Piercings…

December 28, 2017 By in Habitudes, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

The German Marines.

Marines

“Perhaps these will be the hardest three months of their lives,” says a deep-voiced commentator during the opening credits of the show, against a dramatic backdrop of silhouettes of the recruits, who have attracted a strong following on social media.

Financed by the German army at a cost of €7.9m (£7m), the show, consisting of daily episodes of four to seven minutes, is an attempt by the German military, the Bundeswehr, to attract new soldiers at a time when their numbers, following the abolition of conscription six years ago, are at a historic low.

Gleich an Tag eins in der Kaserne bekommen die Rekruten dem Titel der ersten Doku-Folge gemäß einen „Kulturschock“. Sie müssen sich an die strengen Umgangsformen und typischen Gepflogenheiten bei der Bundeswehr gewöhnen.

PS: As seen on Twitter… The hyperbolthalamus is responsible https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/759327 for the progressive brain’s steady production of liberal hype, alarmist rhetoric and hysterical doomsday forecasting.
#fun #books #99c #sale #ebook #humor #scifi #romance

One Out Of Two Ain’t Bad

December 27, 2017 By in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , 1 Comment

One out of two is actually much worse than we thought.

Merkel

They may not be able to get her government to step down – she doesn’t have one anymore – but nearly half of Germans polled would now prefer it if Angela Merkel finally went away already and don’t let the door hit you on your way out.

I know. How’s this? She could drive off into the sunset in this hot old Mercedes that’s going to get auctioned off next month. Low mileage. The passenger seat was hardly ever used.

Die Schwierigkeiten bei der Regierungsbildung lassen den Rückhalt für Kanzlerin Angela Merkel in der Bevölkerung bröckeln. Laut einer Umfrage wollen nur 36 Prozent sie weitere vier Jahre im Amt sehen.

Order Now While The Supply Lasts Or Something

December 26, 2017 By in Home Cooking, Humor Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Brain Quest – A Fantastic Voyage through the Progressive Mind. Out now!

Brain Quest

“Other than a slight run-in with an errant gang of deviant subculture corpuscles our passage through the blameless victim ventricle proved to be rather uneventful.”

Germany

December 22, 2017 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

Beautiful German weapon sale of the week.

Fregate

Because somebody has to admire them.

Only… The German navy doesn’t want this F125 super-frigate they just bought. They want their money back. Or at least have it fixed or something. She doesn’t work right. Like, not at all. Damn. This must be the same boatyard that makes Germany’s submarines.

Zu schwer und zu schief – Fregatte F125 Unsere neue Super-Fregatte – noch nicht im Dienst und schon veraltet.

PS: Order your copy of Brain Quest – A Fantastic Voyage through the Progressive Mind today! The paperback is out now. Get a free sample at Smashwords. Take only as directed.

You Get Cabbage This Year, Kid

December 21, 2017 By in Habitudes, Home Cooking Tags: , , , , Leave a comment

Bah, humbug! Take this German Christmas quiz and see if you failed it like I did.

Quiz

Every year in Germany, the Christkind, a childlike angel, arrives, and with it, Christmas markets and festive spirits. Germany is known the world over for its Christmas traditions. How well do you know them?

PS: More bah, humbug already! Order your copy of Brain Quest – A Fantastic Voyage through the Progressive Mind today! The paperback is out now, by the way. Get a free sample at Smashwords. For risks and side effects ask your doctor or pharmacist.