Dysfunctional, Datfunctional, Main Thing Nothing Works

December 1, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Berlin, Cities, Debt, GDP, Germans, Germany, Government, Poverty Leave a comment

And costs everybody else in the country a whole lot of money. Berlin, my kind of town. My kind of town??

Berlin, the capital of Europe’s most successful economy, is surprisingly badly governed. The new airport, the city’s biggest flagship project, missed its seventh opening date earlier this year and may not open until 2021, ten years after it was originally supposed to. The jobless rate is among the highest in the country. Schools are dismal. Courts and police are so overworked that hundreds of millions of euros in fines and taxes have not been collected; and the city failed to keep tabs on Anis Amri, the jihadist who killed 11 people with a lorry last Christmas, despite warnings about him three weeks earlier…

Astonishingly for a capital city, Berlin makes Germany poorer. Without it, Germany’s GDP per person would be 0.2% higher. By comparison, if Britain lost London, its GDP per person would be 11.1% lower; France without Paris would be 14.8% poorer…

“We have a deeply held suspicion of anything that smacks of efficiency and competence.”

German Of The Day: Parallelgesellschaften

November 28, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Integration, Islam, Migrants, Necla Kelek, Refugees Leave a comment

That means parallel societies.

And this migration research lady, Necla Kelek, a Muslim herself, believes that Familiennachzug or family reunification policies (bringing in the families of the refugee men who came to Germany alone) would contribute to forming these parallel societies – and put a swift end to all the integration efforts the “correct” Germans out there are all so concerned about. You know, that same old been there done that good intentions blowing up in your face stuff?

At least folks like her are allowed to have this opinion.

Familiennachzug fördert Parallelgesellschaften.

It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

November 27, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Berlin, Christmas, German, Germans, Germany, Islamist Terror, Terror, Terrorists 2 Comments

The Glühwein (mulled wine), the ornaments, the Christmas markets fortified with concrete blocks…

Traditional Christmas markets are opening across Germany amid heightened security, almost a year after a terror attack on a Berlin Christmas market killed 12… The Berlin Christmas market, where a Tunisian attacker rammed a truck into visitors on Dec. 19, is to open Monday night with a candlelight ceremony.

Knapp ein Jahr nach dem islamistischen Anschlag ist der Weihnachtsmarkt an der Gedächtniskirche wieder offen. Betonbarrieren und Polizei sollen das Geschäft nicht trüben.

Who Will Be Brave Enough?

November 23, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Airports, BER, Berlin, Failures, Government Waste, Klaus Wowereit, Political Parties, Projects, SPD 3 Comments

To just get it over with and close down Berlin’s new non-existent airport before it ever not opens, I mean.

Nobody will be brave enoug, of course.. Not even after this latest (coming) delay. Can you still call them delays when you get to the ten-year mark?

The latest setback is reportedly due to problems with fire protection. Other errors over the years include badly installed cables, escalators that were too short and a roof that was too heavy.

Corruption is also a factor – last year one former airport employee was sentenced to prison for taking bribes and dozens of others have been fined.

Collateral damage includes construction companies, retail outlets and taxi firms forced into bankruptcy and one former Berlin mayor (SPD) forced out of his job.

Zu Tagesspiegel-Erkenntnissen, denen zufolge eine BER-Eröffnung vor 2021 durch die neuen Informationen zunehmend unwahrscheinlich wird, äußert sich die Flughafengesellschaft nicht direkt.

PS: Happy Thanksgiving!

German Of The Day: Weltspitze

November 7, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Airports, Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Language, Polls, Surveys, Top 10 Leave a comment

That means world-class. And that’s what Berlin is. Or at the very least European-class. When it comes to crappy airports.

Just like at a survey taken a little earlier this year, of the top ten most horrible airports in all of ze Europe, Berlin Tegel and Berlin Schönefeld got on the short list again, although they only managed ranking ninth and tenth this time. Of course if they counted crappy non-existent airports, Berlin BER would have squeezed in there, too. Or do you think they might have a special consolation prize for that category?

Ein Nutzer schreibt sogar, der Flughafen Berlin Schönfeld sei “der schlechteste Flughafen überhaupt”. Alles sei sehr beengt und zu klein für die vielen Reisenden. „Die Wände, die Fenster und der ganze unsaubere Flughafen erwecken den Eindruck, dass man in einem Gefängnis ist, aus dem man fliehen will“.

Homeless Go Home!

October 30, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Berlin, EU, German, Germans, Germany, Homeless, Homelessness, Poles 1 Comment

Homeless go home? So you can be, I dunno, homeless there instead?

There were roughly 2,000 homeless in Berlin twenty years ago. Ever since the Eastern European countries have allowed freedom to travel it plain to see that more and more people live in the city’s streets and parks. The railway station mission and Caritas organization estimate that up to 10,000 homeless are stranded in Berlin today.

Half of the rough sleepers in the German capital are Polish nationals, German news outlet Deutsche Welle has reported.

City authorities and charity organisations in Berlin expect Poland and other Central and Eastern European countries to pull their weight in helping their homeless compatriots by providing financial help and social workers, said Ortrud Wohlwend, from the Berlin-based Stadtmission organisation.

Foreign rough sleepers in Germany are not entitled to any help from the state. They do have the right to medical care as EU citizens, however, and may apply for unemployment benefit after five years of living in the country.

Vor zwanzig Jahren, heißt es, hätten rund 2000 Obdachlose in der Stadt gelebt. Seit der Reisefreiheit für osteuropäische Staaten ist aber mit bloßem Auge zu erkennen, dass in der Stadt immer mehr Menschen auf Straßen und in Parks leben. Bahnhofsmission und Caritas schätzen, heute seien bis zu zehntausend Obdachlose in Berlin gestrandet.

German Of The Day: Tapfer

October 25, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Helplessness, Hideology, High Art, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, Counter-Cuture, Crime, Drug Dealers, Drugs, German, Germans, Germany, Language, Museums, Political Parties, Racism Leave a comment

That means brave or valiant. Yeah, here’s to you tapfer drug dealers hanging out in the parks of Friedrichshain-Kreuzberg.

Only in Berlin, folks. No joke: Somebody over at that district’s museum of local history has set up an exhibition honoring the “undaunted” criminal African drug dealers who carry out their illegal trade despite the slings and arrows of outreageous fortune they are forced to endure like… I dunno. Being pursued by the cops for breaking the law?

Oh yeah, and there’s racism involved, too (there always is). These guys are “in the spotlight of racist animosity” and are the “scapegoats for collective hate” because all they want to do is sell illegal drugs and the system won’t let them do it. Oppression everywhere you look these days, I tell you.

This is an outrage, damn it! That something like this exhibition is possible and it isn’t even meant to be a joke, I mean. Or is it? The more I read this the less sure about it I am.

„Drogendealer leisten einen gesellschaftlich wertvollen und von vielen Menschen geschätzten Dienst – und zwar dort, wo sie gut zu erreichen sind: mitten im Bezirk, vor allem in den Parks.“

PS: Friedrichshain-Kreuzberg is a so-called red-red-green district governed by the Greens, the SPD and the Left Party. Just in case you were wondering.

Berlin’s BER Airport Nonexistent And Too Small At The Same Time

October 23, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Airports, BER, Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Government Waste 2 Comments

Previously thought to be impossible within the realm of phenomenal reality, airport physisists were more than a little shocked today to discover that Berlin’s infamously nonexistent and still not new BER airport – latest takeoff delay soon to be announced for 2019 – is nevertheless much too small, despite its nothingness.

Too small to ever be a grown-up, major hub-like airport, that is. If it ever were to see the light of day, of course. Which it might not. These are theoretical airport physisists we’re talking about here, in case you were wondering.

Ein Start des BER vor 2019 gilt als unwahrscheinlich. Flughafenchef Engelbert Lütke Daldrup will in diesem Jahr einen Eröffnungstermin nennen.

German Of The Day: Diese Fahrt Endet Hier

October 16, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Farts, German, Germans, Germany, Language, Police Leave a comment

That means this drive or line (as in bus line) terminates here.

Of course a foreign, English-speaking person like yourself might think that it means “this fart ends here.” You know, like the buck stops here only it’s a fart? That would be incorrect, however. So don’t think that.

Over the past 18 months, a crime scandal has been rocking Berlin. It’s one that so far has required the work of 23 officials, necessitated a court appearance, and, this week, provoked protests from a politician on the floor of Berlin’s Senate. It’s the unusual nature of the crime that has provoked such controversy and upset. It wasn’t an act of violence against a person, a case of damage to property, or of fraud. It was, in fact, a fart.

Pups kostet Steuerzahler knapp 87 Euro.

Hertha Berlin To Take Kneeling To The Next Level

October 15, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, Footbal, German, Germans, Germany, Hertha BSC, Kneeling, National Anthem, NFL, Soccer, Sports 1 Comment

Anybody can take a stand by kneeling these days, I guess. That’s easy.

Berlin’s beloved soccer team Hertha BSC is doing this kneeling stuff now, too. Wow. Who would have thought that Germans play the American national anthem over here before game time? I had no idea.

Anyway, Hertha’s doing pretty well so far this season so one fan is suggesting that they should go whole hog and try playing in kneeling position throughout the entire game and/or season. The rules are simple: You’re allowed to switch knees only three times during a game. The Star Spangled Banner must be playing at all times, of course. Just a thought.

Der amerikanische Sportler-Protest gegen Diskriminierung erreicht nun auch Deutschland. Vor der Bundesliga-Partie in Berlin setzen die Spieler der Hertha ein bemerkenswertes Zeichen.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

Tag Archives: Berlin