“Friends Don’t Spy On Friends”

So that’s why Germany’s BND spied on EU neighbors and US-Amerika itself, I guess.

BND

The German magazine Der Spiegel has reported that Germany’s Federal Intelligence Service (BND) spied on European and American organizations until 2013.

To what depths have you sunk, Germany? A spy agency that actually spies on people? What will be next? A military that actually goes to war? A border patrol that actually protects your borders? Granted, all of this remains well within the realm of science fiction but we ARE still allowed to speculate about crazy un-German ideas like these in public here. Aren’t we?

So. I assume now that everybody in Germany is going to be REALLY REALLY empört (outraged) about this. Although you know what they say about you when you assume things. How you make an ass- out of u and -me?

Abhören unter Freunden – das geht doch: Ähnlich wie die NSA hat offenbar auch der BND die Kommunikation befreundeter EU-Staaten ausgespäht. Ziele der Spionage waren laut rbb Inforadio offenbar europäische und amerikanische Einrichtungen.

50,000 Demonstrators Expected!

Tens of thousands of Germans are ready to demonstrate in Berlin on October 10. Ready to demonstrate against their country being inundated by what will now be over 1.5 million refugees (this year), you ask? Nah. Langweilig (boring).

TTIP

They’re foaming at the mouth about TTIP, that insidious US-Amerikanische “free trade” conspiracy that – according to leading Rosa Luxemburg lookalikes everywhere – will invariably lead to “lower standards of consumer protection, environmental protection and social standards on both sides of the Atlantic.” And it would also to more free trade, of course, which would be like the way grossest thing of all.

“I think someone wants the issue of the TTIP agreement to disappear from public view,” the politician said, referring to polls, according to which residents of those European countries where public debate on this issue is less intensive than, for example, in Germany or France, are less in favor of rejecting the contract.

German Of The Day: Bierleiche

That means beer corpse.

Bierleiche

And speaking of the Oktoberfest, some of the best finds at the lost-and-found office this year include:

An electric air pump
A toilet brush
bed linen (from the police union)
650 miscellaneous pieces of clothing
600 ID cards and passports
580 wallets
320 cell phones and
250 key rings

They don’t even count the dentures and the wedding rings anymore, I guess.

And getting back to the beer corpse part up there… This year’s winner got carried away in a stretcher 80 minutes after the festivities began.

Ozapft is!

VW Too Big To Fail?

Then it’s too big. Think GM (Government Motors). Only different. As in much worse.

VW

At Volkswagen AG, political connections come already fitted.

When it comes to Volkswagen, German chancellors don’t intervene in company decisions. But the unique arrangement in Lower Saxony (it holds 20 percent of the company) has spawned alumni in high places with an interest in the boardroom, including Merkel’s Social Democratic predecessor, Gerhard Schroeder. Schroeder, who sat on VW’s supervisory board for eight years as state premier, was known as the “auto chancellor” when he led Germany from 1998 to 2005 because of his perceived closeness to the car industry.

Following him to Berlin after serving at his side in Lower Saxony was Frank-Walter Steinmeier, now in his second stint as Merkel’s foreign minister. Sigmar Gabriel, who succeeded Schroeder as state premier — and VW board member — is now vice chancellor and economy minister. He also heads the Social Democratic Party, Merkel’s junior coalition partner. Christian Wulff, a Christian Democrat like Merkel who succeeded Gabriel in the state capital Hanover, made it all the way to the German presidency, before resigning in 2012 amid a legal probe.

Im Abgas-Skandal, dessen Auswirkungen noch unübersehbar sind, rückt die Frage nach der Mitverantwortung der deutschen Politik in den Fokus. Und weil die politischen Spitzen der Republik wie geschockt schweigen und selbst die sonst geliebten Talkshows meiden, werden Vorwürfe laut, die Bundesregierung habe mit Volkswagen gekungelt und möglicherweise sogar von den Manipulationen gewusst.

To Pee Or Not To Pee

(In Germany) That is the question. Standing up, I mean.

Pee

And the next German court has just made its standpoint clear. They’re still on our side, men. Standing. Because they won’t stand for us having to roll over dead by sitting down like that. But how long can we keep going like this?

Gee wizz. Bladder enjoy it now while we still can because let’s face it, pal: Urine danger. So hang in there.

A court in Germany has once again ruled in favor of a man’s right to urinate while standing up after his landlord demanded money for damage to the bathroom floor.

And You Thought Your Government Wastes Money

And it does. But the German state can burn the stuff up pretty good, too – at any level.

Waste

The German Federation of Tax Payers just came out with its latest “Black Book” of government waste, a breathtaking collection of 133 of the most impressive cases of abuse it found. Some are quite imaginative, I must say.

The city of Bergen on the island of Rügen, for instance, ordered 200,000 earthworms from a special firm in Holland for a sports field there – for over 7,000 euros. These special  „Dutch Nightcrawlers“ were supposed to loosen up the hard playing field. They failed at that but made the field so “soiled” with worm Dreck (filth) that it couldn’t be used anymore.

Or how about the five manhole covers in Osnabrück with the colorful LED lamps on the side? They only cost 10,000 euros a shot. They sure are purty, though.

Then there’s the State Ministry for Culture boss who felt the need to have a “cemetery app” developed that would show its users where over 1,000 famous graves are located. It was called “Where They Rest” and all it did was redirect these users to the website with the same name. It only set tax payers back some 548,000 euros, however.

Nicht kleckern sondern klotzen, I say. Don’t take anything halfway.

German Media Giving Germans A Distorted Image Of The Migrant Crisis?

No way. Or way?

Migrant

The German language website Frankfurter Allgemene has reported on how the British media “reports on the crisis differently than the German” media.

The newspaper explains: “When it came to clashes between Hungarian border guards and refugees, the BBC showed young men who threw stones.”

The rioting, fit young men were of course described as “hungry”, “desperate” and “defensive,” but at least the images were shown. The suggestion that such a key part of the developing story was omitted on German TV is a startling one.

“On [German channel] ARD Tagesschau,” Frankfurter Allgemenie reports, “the most dramatic pictures could not be seen – instead, women and children, fleeing the tear gas by security forces [was shown]… German television suggesting disproportionate action by Hungary, however the BBC reported of the “defense of the borders…””

Flüchtlinge sind eine Chance, heißt immerfort. Und das entspricht der Wahrheit. Gleichzeitig jedoch stellen uns die 800 000 Flüchtlinge vor Integrationsprobleme, die offen anzusprechen ein Tabu ist. Menschen, die dies trotzdem tun, werden unbedarft rechts verortet, teils sogar medial beleidigt. Dabei muss das Stellen von Fragen erlaubt sein: Wenn so getan wird, als gäbe es bei hunderttausenden Flüchtlingen keine oder kaum Probleme, können diese auch nicht bekämpft werden.

Germans Outraged Over Russian Air Force Support For Assad

And they’re demonstrating accordingly. No, wait. I got something mixed up here. Now I remember: They’re outraged about American plans to upgrade its nuclear presence in Germany and are demonstrating accordingly about that (the United States intends to place 20 B61-12 nuclear bombs at the Büchel Air Base later this year).

Büchel

And set your watches on this one because it won’t be long before they will also be loudly supporting Putin’s “counter measures to restore the balance of power in Europe.” It’s like tradition or something.

Die Bundesregierung fordert seit langem einen Abzug der Amerikaner.