So who’s going to win today? Germany?
Or Brazil?
Spielerfrauen der Nationalmannschaft: Die elf Volltreffer der DFB-Elf
Good luck, Germany!
Imperial Forces Overrun Frankfurt International Airport
This could never happen in Berlin. Berlin doesn’t have an airport big enough.
The creator of the YouTube video, which shows Storm Troopers and Imperial Shuttles taking over Frankfurt Airport, claimed he captured the scene after landing on a flight from the U.S.
Germany To Introduce American Trust Level Advisory System
Outraged by allegations that a German employee of the German foreign-intelligence agency BND may have been a double-agent who passed along information to the CIA (about a parliamentary inquiry of NSA surveillance programs), the German public’s level of trust towards the USA has now reached such a new level of low that a color-coded trust level advisory scale will now need to be introduced.
Based on the American Homeland Security Advisory System, the coming German Trust-Amerika Level Advisory Scale will have a few fundamental differences, however. The “normal” green trust level will start out at Absolute Zero, for instance. It will then work it’s way down, or up, if you prefer, to Less Than Absolute Zero, Way Less Than Absolute Zero, Highly Less Than Absolute Zero and then to the Severely Less Than Absolute Zero It Doesn’t Get Any Less Absolute Zero Than This, People level.
It is unclear when the new system will be introduced as these plans are super-mega-ultra top secret and have not been officially leaked by the responsible double-agents yet.
“If the suspicion of a targeted attack on a German constitutional body is confirmed, just one year after the first Snowden disclosures, that would set the level of trust back to zero and result in political consequences.”
Fernanda B.
Hannover University: Headbanging Can Be Dangerous
Somebody suffered a little cerebral haemorrhaging at a Motörhead concert or something. Rock and roll!
So if you absolutely positively have to do some headbanging, make sure to do it on the Fourth of July to the National Anthem (thanks for the link, Joe).
Happy Fourth of July, y’all!
Security Sources?
International airports have been asked to expand their screening of passengers before flying to the United States after security sources have warned of possible new terror attacks.
Who might these security sources be? Certainly not the NSA, right?
Nach Angaben deutscher Sicherheitskreise stützten sich die US-Warnungen auf Informationen über eine verstärkte Kommunikation unter europäischen Rückkehrern aus Syrien, Afghanistan und Pakistan.
I’m Not Normally For Boycotts
But maybe we should have considered taking that Waffle House call to boycott Belgian waffles more seriously.
They’re fluffy and delicious, but for this week, they’re the breakfast of the enemy.
With Victories Like This You Don’t Need Any Defeats
Ende gut, alles gut. All’s well that ends well. But the Germans sure didn’t look like they were feeling very well while playing Algeria yesterday.
Would you rather we played beautiful football but got knocked out?
PS: Good luck with Belgium, OOZA!
German Army Wants Armed Drones Just In Case
So it can have the military ability to answer with a resounding no if anybody ever asks them to use them, I mean.
What on earth are they smoking over there with Colonel Klink these days, anyway?
Drone-opponents worry that having armed drones at the Bundeswehr’s disposal will lower inhibitions to use them, too. There is also the fear that fully automatic drones will at some point be able to make decisions regarding life or death. UAVs can already take off and land by themselves and – once programmed – fly routes without human involvement.
Germany’s Germans Better Than Amerika’s Germans
Germans Say. Those soccer playing German-American Germans on the American team, I mean. The German-German Germans are more German-like or something. Gee, I never really thought about that before but that really makes sense.
And that’s why they just had to win last Thursday. And did, of course. But we should gönne (grant) them that and not begrudge them just because we as “Americans want to win everything.” Real Germans don’t want to win everything, I can only assume, and therefore the least the rest of us as in U.S. (and the rest of the world) can do is to finally let them win the World Cup for once already for crying out loud. Or for the third or fourth time now, I forget.
“The US has everything. Hollywood, money, weapons, let us have at least football.”
Observing Hermann 