German Of The Day: Flockdown

Flock means flake. Like snowflake. Get it?

Snow

Heavy snowstorm pounds Germany, upends travel – A snowstorm and strong winds pounded northern and western Germany on Sunday, forcing trains to cancel trips and leading to hundreds of vehicle crashes. Police said 28 people were injured on icy roads. Climate Change just ain’t what it used to be.

In related news (sort of): Too soon to end German lockdown, says Bavarian leader Soeder.

Deutschland im “Flockdown“: Verkehrchaos auf Autobahnen: “Lage ist katastrophal.”

Climate Change Is Real

And some even maintain that the climate has never not changed. No, for real.

Winter

But this here is only weather. Meaning it is unreal. Or fake, if you prefer. Snow in February? In Germany? What a topsy-turvy world we now live in, folks. When will these capricious shifts in weather, I mean climate patterns ever end? Somebody do something about it already.

Germany braces for extreme winter weather – DWD, the German Weather Service, forecast heavy snow and icy temperatures this weekend. Officials said non-essential journeys should be avoided as a number of train services were axed.

 

Merkel Injured While Performing Dangerous Hypocritical Stunt

German chancellor Angela Merkel, childless and enjoying a very generous and guaranteed tax payer-financed income, suffered a severely sanctimonious slipped disc while expressing phony empathy for the “misfortune” of families suffering from the Corona lockdown she and her team of non-elected experts so graciously imposed upon them.

Merkel

She was immediately rushed to a group of specialist spin doctors waiting at the Chancellery where she made a miraculous instantaneous recovery and is now resting comfortably, as usual.

Coronavirus: Germany’s Merkel ‘hurt’ by parents’ struggles – German chancellor Angela Merkel, known for her reserved demeanor, said she was hurt to see the “misfortune” of families suffering in lockdown.

In a rare show of emotion for Germany’s often stony-faced Chancellor, Angela Merkel admitted she was “a bit sad that we have to go through such a time,” while listening to families struggling through a second coronavirus lockdown.

“I’m hurt when I see your misfortune.”

With A Stress On “Symbol”

26 soldiers, eight beds.

Portugal

German military. Get it? There is no German military to speak of. The lady currently running the EU saw to that. A mid-size American city’s police force is more effective.

“A symbol of hope” – German military aid arrives in Portugal – A German military plane carrying over 20 doctors and nurses together with ventilators and hospital beds arrived on Wednesday in coronavirus-stricken Portugal, where a severe rise in cases has prompted several European nations to offer help.

The German team will manage a new unit of eight ICU beds in a private hospital in Lisbon, Hospital da Luz, which was equipped but lacked the staff to operate, Health Minister Marta Temido said at the military base where the plane landed.

“Eight beds may not sound like much, but it is a lot for a health system under significant pressure.”

 

Dig, Uschi! Dig!

It really is fun to watch her. I think she’s gone mad, by the way. But this is the world that Angie Merkel & Co. want.

Uschi

The incompetent Eurocrats are in a horrible hole. So why are they STILL digging?

For politicians across the world, the past 12 months have brought challenges few could have imagined. And inevitably, every government has made its share of mistakes. But for some people, determined to hold up a magnifying glass to Britain’s failings, there has always been a shining beacon of honesty and competence — the EU. Time and again, they insisted that France, Germany and their Continental neighbours put Britain to shame…

The EU’s vaccine shambles has been well chronicled, from its failure to sign a timely deal and secure supplies to its mendacious attempts to blame the British/Swedish pharmaceutical company AstraZeneca and its ham-fisted attempt to close the Irish border. So I don’t intend to rehearse all the gory details. What has shocked me, though, is that instead of apologising, the Brussels elite have doubled down on their mistakes and evasions. Having found themselves in a hole, they have been digging more furiously than ever…

Despite her pompous presidential title, Mrs von der Leyen is not a serious politician. Most German commentators see her as a serial failure, whose time as their defence minister was blighted by her risible inability to arrange proper aircraft procurement. She was parachuted into the Commission presidency as Angela Merkel’s creature, a pliant puppet who would do her mistress’s bidding. But if Mrs Merkel had known what was coming, she would surely have made a better choice.

Nord Stream 2 About To Go South?

With about 100 kilometers left to go?

Nordstream

That would be so beautiful man but something tells me Angie Merkel might just dig in her big heels on this one. If you didn’t already know: Nobody in Europe wants this thing, folks. Nobody except Germany and Russia, so I guess it’s going to happen.

France presses Germany to ditch Nord Stream 2 over Navalny France has urged Germany to scrap a major gas pipeline project — Nord Stream 2 — with Russia. EU members are considering sanctions over the detention of Alexei Navalny and a crackdown against his supporters.

“It’s a decision for Germany, because the pipeline is in Germany.”

After Blowing It With AstraZeneca

By ordering too little too late of the vaccine – maybe we can blow it now with the Chinese and Russian COVID vaccines too.

Vaccines

Go EU.

Coronavirus: Germany open to Chinese and Russian vaccines amid delays – Health Minister Jens Spahn says there is no obstacle to the use of the Sputnik V and Sinopharm vaccines if they receive EU approval. Chancellor Angela Merkel is due to hold a summit Monday to overcome a vaccine shortage.

Spahn’s remarks about Chinese and Russian vaccines come days after he admitted that Germany faces at least a shortfall of vaccines that could continue until April.

Spahn took to social media to warn that the German government will struggle to procure enough shots for the next months.

“We will still have at least 10 tough weeks with a shortage of vaccine,” he tweeted on Thursday.

“Incorrect,” Not Fake

Even though it was fake news. But still. At least everyone knows the report was “incorrect.”

Virus

Everybody except the Germans, of course. You know, state TV and all that? But everybody, even the Germans, do know now what happened with this latest AstraZeneca EU moral outrage show. The EU placed their orders three months later than everybody else, the contract was a “best effort” contract, meaning they would do their best to deliver but could make no guarantees. In other words, the EU bureaucrats made complete fools of themselves, as usual, only this time they documented it in public so everyone else could take turns easily pointing it out to them.

AstraZeneca: German reports on low efficacy on over-65s ‘completely incorrect’ – The British-Swedish pharmaceutical giant said German media reports claiming that the vaccine had an 8% efficacy rate in people above 65 were “completely incorrect.”

 

Merkel Isn’t Merkelchen

Or “little Merkel”. She’s only been gaining weight if anything these days, but that’s getting personal.

Merkel

This guy is. Only he’s not little Merkel either. He’s Merkel’s Mini-Me Man. I know, it’s confusing. Everything in Germany is einfach kompliziert (simply complicated).

Bodo Ramelow, leftwing leader of the German state of Thuringia, stirred nationwide debate after telling Clubhouse users he played Candy Crush during pandemic crisis meetings, and described Chancellor Angela Merkel in one conversation as Merkelchen, or “little Merkel”.

 

How Stunning And Brave

To pretend you would stand up to China when it comes to trade. Even if it was just for a few media moments like that.

China

Impressive. Not. As usual.

Experts Demand Suspension of EU-China Investment Deal – More than a hundred experts are demanding an end to the EU-China investment agreement, DER SPIEGEL has learned. They name serious human rights violations and the suppression of democracy movements in China as the reasons.

“Despite evidence of ethnic cleansing, forced labor, and other gross human rights violations, the leadership of the European institutions have chosen to sign an agreement which exacts no meaningful commitments from the Chinese government to guarantee an end to crimes against humanity or slavery.”