Joe Biden Can Say Squirrel

And that’s not that easy, you know. He can say “xenophobic,” too. For no particular reason at all.

Joe

Joe Biden says all kinds of stuff, all the time. He can say Obama’s healthcare enactment “is a “big f**king deal,” for instance. He can even say to a wheelchair-bound politician to “stand up for a round of applause.” The problem here, of course, is getting Joe Biden to stop staying stuff.

“Look at Germany. Look at the rest of the world. America is the only non-xenophobic nation in the world that’s a major economy.”

This Is Supposed To Be News?

It’s never been any different.

Trust

A poll published by research firm infratest dimap last week indicates German trust in the U.S. has plummeted to lows not seen since the thick of the Iraq war. Another poll, published in May, showed those Germans surveyed were more interested in deepening their country’s ties with China than they were in doing so with the U.S. A third, published in April, showed that nearly half wanted Germany to take a “middle position” in the Ukraine conflict rather than standing firmly on the side of the West.

Maybe The Turks Could Build One Of These New-Fangled Airport Thingies In Berlin, Too

The construction of the world’s largest airport began on June 7 in Istanbul with a massive groundbreaking ceremony. When fully completed in 2018, the 10 billion-euro airport will be able to carry 150 million passengers a year, making it one of the world’s busiest airports.

Airport

Meanwhile, back in Germany…

Berlin’s disastrous airport project (groundbreaking so long ago nobody can remember anymore, at one time planned to open in June 2012 Anno Domini) was hit with another scandal after its technical director was suspended pending an investigation into alleged corruption. A “leading employee” responsible for awarding contracts during the on-going construction of the hopelessly-delayed Berlin Brandenburg airport (BER), is suspected of having demanded €500,000 bribes from a prospective contractor.

Berlin’s airport is already too small.

N S A B N D M O U S E

Who’s the leader of the club
That spies on you and me?
N S A B N D M O U S E!

BND

Germany’s foreign intelligence agency is officially lifting the lid on some of its worst-kept secrets by acknowledging that half a dozen facilities are in fact spy stations.

“Diese Aufgaben gehören zum Kernauftrag des Bundesnachrichtendienstes und beruhen auf gesetzlicher Grundlage. Zu diesen Aufgaben stehen wir, weshalb wir zukünftig auf die Legendierung dieser Außenstellen im Inland verzichten.”

Bio Business Big Bad Business

Everybody buys Bio (organic) here. You know, like with real, non-organic money? It’s not just for the bio bourgeoisie anymore.

Bio

So don’t watch that there “Bio-Illusion” documentary on Arte if you can help it, folks. Not even if you can go back in time to yesterday to see it when it was on, I mean. Which you can’t, I bet.

Those who believe that organic farming is the work of some sinister food mafia will only be reinforced after watching the documentary “Bio-Illusion.” The others will be angry, with good reason.

Wo Bio draufsteht, muss noch längst nicht Bio drin sein.

PS: Speaking of the organic illusion, here’s another one for you here made in the US of A.

German Of The Day: Lebenslänglich

That means life-long, like in a life-long prison sentence?

Prison

That’s what this guy here got for killing that young woman there (and someone else not pictured), pretty much televised live. Actually, he got two life-long prison sentences. And that’s why he’s getting out of prison now because life-long in Germany, as in life-long prison sentence life-long, means 15 years and since he was sentenced in 1991 that means that, well, I dunno, he’s been in there a whole lot of years and it’s only fair that he be allowed to come out now, right?

Das Landgericht in Essen hatte die beiden Männer 1991 zu lebenslanger Haft verurteilt.

Half Of All Germans Too Fat?

And here you thought that Americans were too fat. And they are.

Fat

Ah… screw it. Let’s go out today (Happy Vatertag, Männer) and refocus our thoughts on something more positive and drink a swimming pool of beer! Yee-haw!

Fast ein Drittel der Weltbevölkerung ist übergewichtig oder fettleibig.

Same procedure as every year, men.

What Do You Mean BEFORE World War II?

“Given the horror of the Second World War where the guilt of course strongly lies with Germany and we take responsibility for the terror of National Socialism, we haven’t in Germany had the First World War so much in mind.”

WWI

One indication of Germans’ interest has been the success of the best-seller “The Sleepwalkers” by Australian Christopher Clark…

Experts and critics put the German success of the nearly 900-page title down to the book’s premise that Germany and the Austro-Hungarian Empire didn’t play any greater role than other countries in starting the war.

“People are delighted,” Historian Gerd Krumeich of Duesseldorf University said, sarcastically. “Among German intellectuals there was the conviction that everything led us to Hitler. Clark liberates us from all that by saying to us ‘you’re not more aggressive than the others’,” he said.

All The Butts. All The Time.

Enraged by the German Bild‘s publication of Kate Middleton’s bare butt…

Butt

several British newspapers have retaliated by publishing butt shots of just about anybody’s butt you can imagine who’s a girl. Butt really, isn’t it time for us to leave all of this behind behind us?

The revealing snaps were taken when Kate’s blue dress blew up in an unfortunate ‘Marilyn moment’ during her official tour of Australia last month.

No British magazine or newspaper would print the photo so they were sold overseas in a move which will no doubt deeply dismay Prince William and Kate.

Why Are These Eurosceptic Parties Winning?

The professional Europeans in Brussels made clear that they don’t want this to happen.

Alternative

So what do they do then? They do what they always do: Ignore what just happened and carry on with EU business as usual, whatever that is. Well, one thing we do know about EU business as usual in the meantime is that it is carried out by a Brussels political elite that Jane and Joe European simply does not understand nor feel represented by.

Not that anyone out there cares or anything, but the voter turnout for this latest round of European elections was absolutely pathetic and those who did vote voted in one-fifth of the new European Parliament’s seats to political parties critical of the EU’s previous policy, whatever that was. You would think that the elite would finally get the message here, right? Nope. It ain’t happening. And that’s why it ain’t happening with Europe.

I know. Why doesn’t Brussels consider acknowledging this overwhelming European apathy and start respecting how those Europeans who did vote have voted and slowly start the process of giving back competencies to the countries in question? You know, decentralize and let Europeans start deciding more for themselves at the local level again? Na. Wozu (what for)? If it wasn’t decided in Brussels, it didn’t happen.

Für den schlichten Normaleuropäer sei der schwierige Konsensfindungsprozess in der EU zu komplex. Der leider etwas beschränkte Bürger wisse gar nicht, wie gut die EU für ihn sei. So redet sich die „europäische Elite“ das Wahlergebnis schön und blendet die Tatsache der drastisch schwindenden Zustimmung aus.

PS: Speaking of winning, Tempelhof loses. I mean wins?