Merkel Has Everything Under Control

Not. As usual not. But now the Germans are finally beginning to notice.

Merkel

“We have decided that hair salons can reopen on March 1.”

Despite myriad warnings in summer 2020, including from Merkel herself, of the dangers of a second pandemic wave, it was allowed to crash over the country at year’s end, almost completely unhindered. And despite Germany being the economically strongest country in the European Union, and despite holding the rotating presidency of the Council of the EU until the end of December, Merkel was unable to leverage that power when it came to buying sufficient quantities of vaccine.

“I can’t really give you a good answer.”

Crappy Films A Comin’

Corona Or Not. Crappy and politicized. But crappy.

Crappy

The 71st Berlin festival will be a unique event. Due to the ongoing coronavirus pandemic, Berlin 2021 will be split into two stages. From March 1 through March 5, the festival will hold an online-only event mainly for the international industry. The European Film Market will also go virtual, following a model established last year by the likes of Cannes and the American Film Market in Santa Monica.

An in-person festival in the German capital, with red-carpet screenings and gala events, is planned for June 9-June 20.

 

German Nationalism Shows Its Ugly Face

By wanting to protect its citizens from incompetent, unelected European bureaucrats.

Germany

That’s not very nice. What about European solidarity or, whatever they call it these days? We should all die at the same rate. Equally. I know: We’ll call them rotten Nazis!

Merkel Ally Urges Germany to Circumvent EU on Covid Shots – A senior member of Angela Merkel’s conservative bloc took a swipe at the chancellor’s vaccine strategy, calling for Germany to purchase shots at the national level because the European Union is too slow.

At the current rate, Germany will need 2.8 years to inoculate 75% of the population with a two-dose vaccine.

Climate Change Is Real

And some even maintain that the climate has never not changed. No, for real.

Winter

But this here is only weather. Meaning it is unreal. Or fake, if you prefer. Snow in February? In Germany? What a topsy-turvy world we now live in, folks. When will these capricious shifts in weather, I mean climate patterns ever end? Somebody do something about it already.

Germany braces for extreme winter weather – DWD, the German Weather Service, forecast heavy snow and icy temperatures this weekend. Officials said non-essential journeys should be avoided as a number of train services were axed.

 

Merkel Injured While Performing Dangerous Hypocritical Stunt

German chancellor Angela Merkel, childless and enjoying a very generous and guaranteed tax payer-financed income, suffered a severely sanctimonious slipped disc while expressing phony empathy for the “misfortune” of families suffering from the Corona lockdown she and her team of non-elected experts so graciously imposed upon them.

Merkel

She was immediately rushed to a group of specialist spin doctors waiting at the Chancellery where she made a miraculous instantaneous recovery and is now resting comfortably, as usual.

Coronavirus: Germany’s Merkel ‘hurt’ by parents’ struggles – German chancellor Angela Merkel, known for her reserved demeanor, said she was hurt to see the “misfortune” of families suffering in lockdown.

In a rare show of emotion for Germany’s often stony-faced Chancellor, Angela Merkel admitted she was “a bit sad that we have to go through such a time,” while listening to families struggling through a second coronavirus lockdown.

“I’m hurt when I see your misfortune.”

With A Stress On “Symbol”

26 soldiers, eight beds.

Portugal

German military. Get it? There is no German military to speak of. The lady currently running the EU saw to that. A mid-size American city’s police force is more effective.

“A symbol of hope” – German military aid arrives in Portugal – A German military plane carrying over 20 doctors and nurses together with ventilators and hospital beds arrived on Wednesday in coronavirus-stricken Portugal, where a severe rise in cases has prompted several European nations to offer help.

The German team will manage a new unit of eight ICU beds in a private hospital in Lisbon, Hospital da Luz, which was equipped but lacked the staff to operate, Health Minister Marta Temido said at the military base where the plane landed.

“Eight beds may not sound like much, but it is a lot for a health system under significant pressure.”

 

Dig, Uschi! Dig!

It really is fun to watch her. I think she’s gone mad, by the way. But this is the world that Angie Merkel & Co. want.

Uschi

The incompetent Eurocrats are in a horrible hole. So why are they STILL digging?

For politicians across the world, the past 12 months have brought challenges few could have imagined. And inevitably, every government has made its share of mistakes. But for some people, determined to hold up a magnifying glass to Britain’s failings, there has always been a shining beacon of honesty and competence — the EU. Time and again, they insisted that France, Germany and their Continental neighbours put Britain to shame…

The EU’s vaccine shambles has been well chronicled, from its failure to sign a timely deal and secure supplies to its mendacious attempts to blame the British/Swedish pharmaceutical company AstraZeneca and its ham-fisted attempt to close the Irish border. So I don’t intend to rehearse all the gory details. What has shocked me, though, is that instead of apologising, the Brussels elite have doubled down on their mistakes and evasions. Having found themselves in a hole, they have been digging more furiously than ever…

Despite her pompous presidential title, Mrs von der Leyen is not a serious politician. Most German commentators see her as a serial failure, whose time as their defence minister was blighted by her risible inability to arrange proper aircraft procurement. She was parachuted into the Commission presidency as Angela Merkel’s creature, a pliant puppet who would do her mistress’s bidding. But if Mrs Merkel had known what was coming, she would surely have made a better choice.

After Blowing It With AstraZeneca

By ordering too little too late of the vaccine – maybe we can blow it now with the Chinese and Russian COVID vaccines too.

Vaccines

Go EU.

Coronavirus: Germany open to Chinese and Russian vaccines amid delays – Health Minister Jens Spahn says there is no obstacle to the use of the Sputnik V and Sinopharm vaccines if they receive EU approval. Chancellor Angela Merkel is due to hold a summit Monday to overcome a vaccine shortage.

Spahn’s remarks about Chinese and Russian vaccines come days after he admitted that Germany faces at least a shortfall of vaccines that could continue until April.

Spahn took to social media to warn that the German government will struggle to procure enough shots for the next months.

“We will still have at least 10 tough weeks with a shortage of vaccine,” he tweeted on Thursday.

“Incorrect,” Not Fake

Even though it was fake news. But still. At least everyone knows the report was “incorrect.”

Virus

Everybody except the Germans, of course. You know, state TV and all that? But everybody, even the Germans, do know now what happened with this latest AstraZeneca EU moral outrage show. The EU placed their orders three months later than everybody else, the contract was a “best effort” contract, meaning they would do their best to deliver but could make no guarantees. In other words, the EU bureaucrats made complete fools of themselves, as usual, only this time they documented it in public so everyone else could take turns easily pointing it out to them.

AstraZeneca: German reports on low efficacy on over-65s ‘completely incorrect’ – The British-Swedish pharmaceutical giant said German media reports claiming that the vaccine had an 8% efficacy rate in people above 65 were “completely incorrect.”

 

Merkel Isn’t Merkelchen

Or “little Merkel”. She’s only been gaining weight if anything these days, but that’s getting personal.

Merkel

This guy is. Only he’s not little Merkel either. He’s Merkel’s Mini-Me Man. I know, it’s confusing. Everything in Germany is einfach kompliziert (simply complicated).

Bodo Ramelow, leftwing leader of the German state of Thuringia, stirred nationwide debate after telling Clubhouse users he played Candy Crush during pandemic crisis meetings, and described Chancellor Angela Merkel in one conversation as Merkelchen, or “little Merkel”.