Merkozy This Is Not

October 19, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, History, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, EU, Euro, France, German, Germans, Germany, Hollande, Humor, Ideology, Merkel, Paris, Politics, Satire, The Euro Crisis, The Euro Zone Leave a comment

How about Hollmerk?

The two capitals (Berlin and Paris) always begin from very different positions, whether there is a socialist or conservative administration in Paris.

The concern in Berlin is over what is seen as the absence of a clear strategy on eurozone reform from the new French government. There is a deep suspicion that France is happy to have a weaker euro, higher inflation, and a looser monetary policy than Germany.

Mr Hollande’s refusal to incorporate the recent “fiscal compact” into the French constitution is one reason that Germany is now pushing for every country to sign a bilateral budget “contract” with the European Commission, that can be enforced by a powerful budget commissar… But Paris regards Ms Merkel as being overly focused on building deeper European political integration in a way that ignores deep-seated reticence in France reflected in the 2005 referendum defeat of the then-planned EU constitution.

Get A Job 101

October 16, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Helections, Helplessness, Higher Education, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Hartz IV, Humor, Pirate Party, Pirates, Political Parties, Satire, Welfare Leave a comment

You couldn’t make this stuff up if you had to, people. Not that anybody cares about Germany’s Pirate Party anymore, but I do have to admit that these guys still keep coming up with real zingers.

The latest coup: The party’s general manager in Berlin, Johannes Ponader, up until now a proud and long-term welfare recipient, is now celebrating his closing with this stage of his life (for now, anyway) by openly calling for public donations to help him finance his hard-pressed, well, livelihood (or lack of it).

Strangely, this actually seems to have upset some of the other pirates out there (they seem a bit touchy these days for some reason) who think that maybe this might cause some kind of a Glaubwürdigkeitsdilemma (credibility dilemma) or something. As if.

Like I said, not that anybody cares anymore or anything.

“Hier entsteht der Eindruck, dass jemand politische Ideen mit persönlichen Vorteilen verknüpft.”

Big Sister Assures Germans That 47-Percent Price Hike Actually Not Such A Bad Thing If You Think About It

October 15, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Humor, Hustle (Hoax), Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Dogma, Economics, Energiewende, German, Germans, Germany, Green energy, Humor, Ideology, Nuclear energy, Politics, Renewable energy, Satire, The Energy Turnaround, The Green Shirts Leave a comment

Not.

Worried about grassroots unrest after Germany’s electrical grid operators announced they were nearly doubling the charge consumers will pay to finance subsidies for renewable energy as Germany phases out nuclear power, Big Sister herself has reacted boldly and decisively by going into hiding and pretending as if none of this were really happening.

Long used to this tactic, worried German consumers were assured, sort of, as they will now be paying an additional 60 euros per year, “taking overall add-on power taxes up to about 185 euros.” But that’s just the start, of course.

Sheesh. Why do Germans see everthing energy turnaround-related so negatively these days? You know, like as in black? Or like as in blackouts, I should say?

“The costs for consumers and industry of the electricity price charge for renewable energy has risen to an unbearable degree.”

This Still Doesn’t Beat Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize

October 13, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helplessness, High Art, Humor, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, EU, European Union, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Jokes, Nobel Committee, Nobel Peace Prize, Satire, The Euro Crisis, The Euro Zone, The Financial Crisis Leave a comment

But it comes close.

Many euroskeptics clearly just don’t get it. Of course the Norwegian Nobel Committee’s decision to award the Nobel Peace Prize to the European Union is “beyond parody,” “laughable” and an “April Fool’s Joke.” That’s been the whole point of the thing for years now.

Hasn’t it?

In Britain, Friday’s award has been the subject of particularly heated commentary. Iain Martin, a columnist with the conservative Daily Telegraph dismissed the prize as “beyond parody.” He writes that the prize has been awarded prematurely because “we have no idea how the experiment to create an anti-democratic federation will end.” Besides, he writes, “daftest of all is the notion that the EU itself has kept the peace.” Instead, he writes, it was the Brits and the Americans who brought peace to the Continent.

Even the EU-friendly Economist columnist Charlemagne writes, “Hmmm,” questioning the timing of the award, given that the EU is currently threatened with a break-up.

German “Critical Thinking” vs. American Debate Culture

October 3, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helections, High Art, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Humor, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Criticial Thinking, Debates, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Ideology, Political Cutlure, Political Debates, Politics, Presidential Debates, Satire 3 Comments

Here is another interesting German commentary by American Eric T. Hansen in Die Zeit.

I’d like to translate it all, but I can’t, so I won’t (no time). Here are a few highlights, though:

Critical thinking does not allow for self-criticism. Where would we be then?

Critical thinking is not debating, it’s finding concensus, or, as I call it, harmony nagging (Harmonienörgeln): Two people criticize a third person so long until the two become friends.

If I want to hear a new or even a different perspective on something, I have to turn to the Anglo-American press. Regarding certain questions – for instance whether nuclear energy, genetically modified corn or having Mitt Romney as president might also have certain advantages – many of my German friends are not even aware that two sides to these arguments even exist.

I too understand Mitt Romney’s positions quite well and suspect that he would make just as good (or bad) a president as Obama. In America that makes me an intellectual. In Germany that makes me a right-winger.

Everything is so serious for the Germans, and they need to know immediately: “Who is my friend, who is my enemy?” For Americans and their debate clubs, however, there is always an element of playfulness involved.

Auch ich verstehe die Positionen eines Mitt Romney gut und ahne, dass er ein ebenso guter (oder schlechter) Präsident wie Obama wäre. In Amerika macht mich das zu einem Intellektuellen. In Deutschland macht mich das zu einem Rechten.

Make Embargo Not War

October 2, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Heconomy, Hi-tech, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, Exports, German, Germans, Germany, Iran, Islam, Islamic Terrorists, Military Exports, Nuclear Technology, Nuclear weapons, Terrorists, Weapons Exports Leave a comment

And make a killing with illegal nuclear technology exports to Iran in the process.

Here’s German pacifism at its finest: Nuclear technology for Germany? Have you gone mad!? German nuclear technology exports for Iran? Let’s talk.

Recent arrests suggest that Germany remains a hub for sales of prohibited supplies to Iran that are being used in Iran’s nuclear program. Illegal exports are undermining Chancellor Angela Merkel, who has pursued an embargo policy in order to prevent a possible war in the Middle East.

“Germany will do everything that it can to ensure that trade with Iran will not simply seek out new routes.”

Grass Caught Smoking Grass Again

September 30, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hate, Heconomy, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Günter Grass, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Intellectuals, Israel, Left-Wing Intellectuals, Satire Leave a comment

After basking in the glory of his warmly received and highly acclaimed anti-Israeli poem in April, Germany’s Nobel Prize-winning author Günter Grass just can’t seem to help himself and has published yet another poetic work criticizing Israeli policy.

In his latest magnum opus, he praises, among other things, “A Hero in Our Time,” Mordechai Vanunu, who served 18 years in prison for espionage after betraying his country’s nuclear secrets to the Sunday Times of London.

By absoulte sheer amazing coincidence, Grass just released this work in a new book of poems yesterday appropriately entitled “Eintagsfliegen” (One-Hit Wonders) and in no way intended or intends to bring any unwarranted attention to himself and/or said book which can now be purchased online or at a bookstore near you.

And please remember: This is not, never has been nor never will be anti-Semitic abuse. Enlightened Germans (and all Germans are) don’t do that kind of stuff (anymore). This is freakin’ German Nobel Prize-winning author Gunter Grass we’re talking about here, people. For crying out loud.

In 2006, Grass admitted in an interview that he had joined the Waffen-SS as a teenager at the end of World War II, and was accused at the time of having hidden the truth for decades while at the same time pointing the finger at others for hiding their Nazi past.

European Subsidies Not Enough For Airbus

September 27, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Heconomy, Hi-tech, High Art, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: Airbus, Berlin, Boeing, EADS, Fines, German, Germans, Germany, Government Subsidies, Humor, Illegal Financing, Satire, Subsidies Leave a comment

Now they need American ones, too.

Brussels on Thursday sought WTO approval for trade sanctions against Washington worth $12 billion a year.

“On the one side we have $90 billion (70 billion euros) of illegal financing of Airbus by the EU and on the other side we have $3.0-$4.0 billion for Boeing.”

Nothing New And Nothing Improved

September 26, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Helections, Helplessness, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Banking, Banks, Berlin, Debt Crisis, Elections, Euro Crisis, Financial crisis, German, Germans, Germany, Political Parties, Regulation, Socialism, SPD, Steinbrück, The Three Stooges Leave a comment

That tired old SPD.

With three tired old SPD guys trying to decide which one of them will have to be the one tired old SPD guy who will have to be the contender in next year’s election against the ridiculously popular Angela Merkel.

So like one of them, former Finance Minister Peer Steinbrück, threw his hat into the ring yesterday, sort of.

His angle? Eat the banks. Split their investment and retail units and have them create their own rescue fund and make them be good and nice again like they used to be in the past (I guess) als die Welt noch in Ordnung war (when the world was still in order).

Been there, done that. Yawn already. Bring out the next stooge and let’s get him over with, too.

“Banks are service providers and not betting shops.”

The Amazing Disappearing Political Party

September 25, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: Anarchy, Berlin, Chaos, Elections, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Ideology, Political Parties, Satire, The Pirate Party, The Pirates Leave a comment

Who says that in-fighting and a complete absence of credibility, character, policy, tactics or strategy can’t get you anywhere? It got Germany’s Pirate Party to nowhere fast. So you better take one quick look at them while you still can.

They’re down to five percent in the polls at the moment, and sinking fast. But let’s move on now and just try to remember them for all the good things they accomplished while they were still here among the living (hell if I know, I thought you might have).

Die Piraten liegen einer neuen Umfrage zufolge nur noch bei fünf Prozent und müssen damit um den Einzug in den Bundestag bangen.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

Category Archives: Habitudes