GedächtnisEsser?

You say ‘tomato’, I say ‘tomato’… You say ‘Wesen‘, I say ‘vessen’…

The stupid creature names are fine. What isn’t, however, is that for the entire duration of the show, every single actor on it has mispronounced the very easy German word for creature…

I kept hearing “vessen” this and “vessen” that, and I had no idea what the characters were talking about, until I saw an episode summary on Hulu with what I surmised was that word written out: Wesen, which literally translates to being or creature (from gewesen, of one of the past-tense forms of the verb to be, sein)…

Trouble is, any German 5-year-old will tell you that word is pronounced VAY-zen, with a V sound (which Grimm gets right), a long E (in the German sense—pronounced like in dreidel), and a soft S (that approximates the English Z).

Foreigners Have Lower Chances Of Getting A Job Than Germans Do?

In Germany? Wow, that’s a real shocker. Who would have expected that?

Ausländer

Maybe they’ve been applying at the wrong places, though. This radical Salifist dude here had no trouble getting a job working in the highly sensitive baggage handling section at Düsseldorf Airport, for instance. Despite having an intensive security check done on him first, I mean.

Think positive, folks. You can do it. You just have to get out there and show a little private initiative, I always say.

Der 27-Jährige wird zum Umfeld des deutschen Salafisten Sven Lau gerechnet. Er soll zu jenen Männern gehören, die Anfang September in Wuppertal als “Scharia-Polizei” aufgetreten waren.

PS: “The best thing in sports, period: Game 7.” Go Giants!

Only One-Third?

Only about one third of German students are interested in current events and politics these days.

German far-right groups and hooligans sure seem pretty interested, though.

German authorities were considering measures to limit the right to demonstrate, after dozens of policemen were injured as a protest by far-right groups purportedly aimed against Islamic extremism turned violent.

North Rhine-Westphalia’s interior minister said freedom of assembly was misused by neo-Nazi groups and members of Germany’s football hooligan scene who held a rally in Cologne, western Germany, on Sunday 26 October.

“This was no political demonstration, but a platform for violence.”

 

Terrorists Are People, Too

And it would be wrong to hurt their feelings. So that is why German comedian Dieter Nuhr has been reported to the police for anti-Islamic agitation. In Germany. By a Muslim. This guy had the nerve to make fun of Osama bin Laden himself – and Islamic terrorists and “martyrs” in general.

It is unclear if the Muslim who reported him ever reported Osama bin Laden to the police for anti-Islamic agitation, too. But that is beside the point, many hand-wringing Gutmensch-Germans are already pointing out. Islamic terrorists commit their acts in the name of Islam. So by making fun of them you also insult their religion, or so the reasoning must be. Ever feel like you’ve woken up in Wonderland?

„Ich habe kein Verständnis dafür, dass die bei uns lange erkämpfte Meinungsfreiheit nicht mehr ernst genommen wird, wenn sich Islamisten dagegenstemmen.“

German Balloonists Forced To Land In A Place Called Nebraska

They rose to 13,000 feet as they crossed into Kansas…

Balloonists

Ah, Nebraska weather — known killer of Sunday golf rounds, lazy days at Branched Oak Lake and a German couple’s hopes of winning an international ballooning competition.

Strangely, when asked about their ordeal later, the Germans said it was “nice.”

“I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.”

German Police Academy II?

Word is out that Germans will “most likely” provide military training to Kurdish groups in northern Iraq.

Kurds

That’s cool, I guess. But we can only hope that these trainers won’t be as ineffective as those who just spent ten years training Afghan police forces and failed miserably at it.

German officials have been training police in Afghanistan for a decade, but a visit to their training center in Mazar-e-Sharif creates major doubts about the effectiveness of the mission. Afghan police remain poorly prepared to tackle the mighty challenges they will face as Western forces withdraw.

Ineffective and Unsustainable: Failure Threatens Afghan Police Training Mission

Hitler Coffee Creamer?

We’ve replaced their regular coffee creamer with Hitler Creamer. Let’s see if they notice!

Hitler Coffee Creamer

Some coffee drinkers in Switzerland have been startled to find images of Hitler or Mussolini on their packages of coffee creamer. The faux pas has yielded embarrassed sputters from the vendors involved.

Well… Taste the Fascist Freshness! It’s Good to the Last Bullet!

Geschmacklose Kaffeesahne: Ein Zulieferer der Schweizer Supermarktkette Migros hat faschistische Diktatoren auf Plastikbecher gedruckt. Mittlerweile distanzierte sich Migros vom Hersteller.

I Got Your Easy Rider For You Right Here

You’ve got it all here. You’ve got your German-Moraccan ISIS supporters getting arrested in Germany for trying to ship 7500 boots, 6000 military jackets and 100 military shits (130,000 euros total) to their pals in Syria.

German Biker

And then you’ve got your German biker gang (with strong Kurdish ties) bearing arms on an aid mission to Kurds fighting in the besieged Syrian city of Kobane.

I think I’ll go with the bikers.

Der Deutschmarokkaner habe nach Syrien ausreisen wollen, berichten die Ermittler. Das habe mit der Festnahme verhindert werden können. Der Libanese sei für die Lieferung von 7500 Stiefeln, 6000 Militärjacken und 100 Militärhemden im Wert von über 130.000 Euro nach Syrien verantwortlich gewesen, hieß es. Die Kleidungsstücke habe er in Deutschland aufgekauft und dann den Transport in das Bürgerkriegsland organisiert.

Germans Hate Monopolies

Unless they are labor monopolies, of course. They’re always showing Verständnis (understanding) for strikes. And this despite the fact that only about a fifth of employees in Germany are union members.

Strike

It might be a bit different this time, however. The latest hostage-taking of millions of German travelers over the weekend (a weekend in which there are more travelers than usual due to school breaks in most German Länder) during a 50+ hour strike by the GDL train drivers’ union is finally starting to piss people off here.

It’s becoming increasing clear that the union’s boss Claus Weselsky, is suffering from “delusions of omnipotence” and that his thirst for power has less to do with the interests of the train drivers then he would like us to believe. And the passengers? What passengers?

By the way, unlike labor monopolies, Germans don’t generally like leaders with “delusions of omnipotence” anymore.

Es ist erstaunlich, dass sich die Lokführer auf dieses Spiel einlassen. Denn Weselsky ist gerade dabei, seine eigene Klientel durch den Dreck zu ziehen. Für die Erschließung neuer Kompetenzfelder lässt er es zu, dass ganz Deutschland aufschreit: Stoppt die Lokführer! Dabei geht es hier gar nicht um die Lokführer. Die werden von der GDL bestens und uneingeschränkt vertreten, selbst wenn sie bei der Konkurrenz organisiert sind.