On a day like today, it’s the thought that counts.

And here is a little summary of what politically correct thinking German intelectuals have to, uh, “think” about the subject (as if you didn’t know already). You might not be able to stomach reading the whole article so I thought a summary would be in order. Some of these observations are really hilarious, by the way, which is kind of inappropriate considering the occasion, but still. So ab geht die Post (here we go)!

This is Bush’s tragic legacy.

9/11 triggered America’s “decline.”

The American superpower has lost the goodwill “the world” gave it after the attacks.

America is now seen as a perpetrator of violence itself (not as a victim, like Germany, for instance).

Before the attacks, America was in full bloom — like Rome at its peak (that comparison with Rome is one of their absolute favorites, as you know — decline, get it?).

America is trapped in Iraq, Afghanistan and in Pakistan (trapped in an embrace with Pakistan?).

“America can no longer even mourn its victims properly because Americans have long been not just victims, but also perpetrators.”

America is a country at war with itself because five percent of Americans buy almost 40 percent of all consumer goods sold in the country (and that’s not even counting what they shoplift).

America has become distrustful, fearful and defensive — against Muslims (who would have thought that? — that could never happen in Germany).

Citizen militias hunt down illegal immigrants.

Americans can still not accept having a black president in the White House.

As to “American exceptionalism,” many things in America are only exceptional because they are exceptionally bad.

The US has become estranged from the rest of the world.

Americans cheered spontaneously on the streets when they heard the news (of bin Laden’s death).

Because of this, the sins of the original victim were brought into focus — America’s sins.

The superpower has only itself to blame.

Have a sad 9/11!