If Only The United States Could Do Everything Right Too

Remember: Corona only spikes in the United States because, well, we do everything wrong.

Light

Not so in ze Europe. Take Germany, for example. They’ve done everything right so far (face masks, social distancing, strict restrictions, etc). The Germans even did a big lockdown already, just a few months back. And now, because the first lockdown worked so well and was so much fun, I guess, Germany is going to lockdown again. Only this time they refer to it as a “lockdown light.” Light as in restaurants, bars, hotels, gyms etc. will no longer have any guests and professional sports events will be held without spectators. And everybody stays home, of course. Sound vaguely familiar? It should. It is. But maybe this light lockdown will be more effective than that heavy one they did first. It’s all a question of having a positive attitude. Something Germans are world famous for.

Germany to go into circuit-break lockdown as coronavirus surges – Germany will impose an emergency month-long lockdown that includes the closure of restaurants, gyms and theatres to reverse a spike in coronavirus cases that risks overwhelming hospitals, Chancellor Angela Merkel said on Wednesday.

 

German Of The Day: Gastro-Lockdown

That means gastro lockdown. You know, as in gastronomy lockdown?

Gastro

It’s coming to Germany. Wow, and this in a country that has Corona under control (if you watch American mainstream media news). Angela “we can do it” Merkel will be announcing today and making sure that – take a deep breath now – restaurants, bars, clubs discotheques, pubs, as well as theaters, opera houses, concert houses, whore houses, casinos, amusement parks, film theaters, sport clubs, betting shops, swimming pools and gyms will be closed down for a bit. For our own protection. Not necessarily for the people who work there or own them, of course, but still. It’s a start. And what a whore house and some of the others there have to do with gastronomy I’ll leave up to you.

Otherwise though, everything else can remain open. For now.

Unter anderem sollen Gastronomiebetriebe sowie Bars, Clubs, Diskotheken, Kneipen und ähnliche Einrichtungen geschlossen bleiben. Gleiches soll für Theater, Opern, Konzerthäuser, Messen, Kinos, Freizeitparks, Spielhallen, Spielbanken, Wettannahmestellen, Bordelle, Freizeit- und Amateursportbetrieb, Schwimm- und Spaßbäder und Fitnessstudios gelten.

If Only The United States Could Get Covid Under Control Like The Europeans Have

Not, I mean. Take Germany, for example. Please.

Covid

Despite doing everything right (just ask the government, they’ll tell you they have) Angela Merkel is now considering a “lockdown light.”

Global report: Merkel says Germany faces ‘difficult months ahead’ in Covid fight – Chancellor says country is on verge of losing control as Europe death toll passes 250k.

“We are seeing very, very high positivity rates and an increasing lack of capacity to do any effective form of contact tracing, which is going to further drive the disease into darkness.”

No Russian Collusion Here

Because it’s German collusion instead.

Justice

German businessman charged over exports to Russian military – Prosecutors say a German businessman and an alleged accomplice have been charged over the delivery of machinery to a company linked to the Russian military in violation of European Union sanctions

Ihm wird vorgeworfen, zwischen 2016 und 2018 Werkzeugmaschinen im Wert von acht Millionen Euro an einen staatlichen Rüstungskonzern geliefert zu haben, der Raketensysteme für die russische Armee herstellt.

 

Germany Tough Now On China?

Sure they are. And I’ve got some swamp land in Florida I can offer you for next to nothing.

China

The Germans are bought and they know it.

Merkel’s China Reset Is Mostly Hollow – As the engine of German export growth, the destination of $100 billion worth of German goods last year, and Germany’s biggest overall trading partner, China is not just a large and profitable market. Germans see China as the mechanism for sustaining the only prolonged era of domestic harmony their country has ever known.

German Of The Day: Sperrstunde

That means curfew.

Sperrstunde

The first one in Berlin in 70 years. It’s a good thing that Germany (and the German capital) has this corona thing under control, right?

Coronavirus: Berlin’s first curfew in 70 years kicks in – The German capital has implemented a nighttime curfew in response to a dramatic increase in COVID-19 cases. On the first night of the new regulations the mood was somber in the Friedrichshain district, a virus hot spot…

Leaving a Späti — the Berlin colloquialism for a kiosk — a group of friends is struggling to haul a crate of beer outside into the heavy drizzle, joking that they need to stockpile supplies — or, as Germans would say “hamster” — before the new curfew kicks in.

Number Of Germans Reporting In Sick Has Fallen To Dangerously Low Levels

This is a real German dilemma. How do you gracefully call in sick to stay home when you’re already home playing sick in the first place? OK, to avoid being sick. But still.

Sick

Coronavirus: Fewer Germans call in sick during pandemic – With many avoiding the doctor’s office and working from home during the coronavirus pandemic, the number of German workers reporting in sick has fallen to below average levels.

“After a record high at the end of March, the number of sick employees insured by TK dropped to a below-average level.”

PS: And this at a time when other folks refuse to call in sick when maybe they ought of sort of should.

€3 Million Might Sound Like A Humble Beginning

But the German state governments have only just begun collecting the money. It’s a sum that is certainly ausbaufähig (capable of being developed, i.e. increased).

Fines

Coronavirus: German cities issue 35,000 fines to rulebreakers – Germany’s biggest cities have collected more than €3 million in penalties from violators of coronavirus restrictions. Munich and Hamburg, which have been hit hardest by the pandemic, have doled out the most fines.

 

Now Is Your Chance To Become An Über Driver

Über, get it? Hardy, har, har. That means over or above in German.

Über

German-made Flying Taxi Unveiled in Paris – A German tech company, along with French regional officials, have unveiled a prototype of a flying taxi that could begin demonstration flights in Paris as early as 2024.

At a news conference Wednesday at the Pontoise airport near Cergy, west of Paris, the Volocopter company presented the VoloCity air taxi, an electric vertical takeoff and landing vehicle, which the company will begin testing at the airport in June.

On October 31, 2020, BER Will Open

But don’t tell anyone, OK? It’s too embarrassing.

Airport

Berlin’s new international airport can open next month after an embarrassing nine-year delay despite the coronavirus pandemic taking a big bite out of air travel, its chief manager said Tuesday…

BER was set to open in 2011 but the date was repeatedly pushed back over a series of issues, including fire safety and corruption.

In the meantime, the cost of the facility exploded to 6.5 billon euros ($7.6 billion) from a 1.7-billion-euro budget initially.

“There won’t be a big party, just an opening.”