The Perfect Choice

This woman  has been in charge of the German Bundeswehr for what feels like decades and has accomplished absolutely nothing other than to stumble from one self-inflicted scandal to the other without ever having to face the consequences because, being one of Angela Merkel’s top girls (and therefore being more equal than the other girls), she is simply too good and too big to fail.

Leyen

That is why she is the ideal choice to head the European Commission. Un-freakin’-believable.

Germany’s Ursula von der Leyen nominated to lead EU Commission – EU leaders have put forward their nominations for the bloc’s top jobs, with a woman for the first time proposed as European Commission chief.

The surprise choice of German Defence Minister Ursula von der Leyen to replace Jean-Claude Juncker came after the main front-runners were rejected.

“Von der Leyen is a very good candidate and a very good choice to head the European Commission. Her capacities and competences totally qualified her.”

Ho-hum, They Found Another Bomb In The Neighborhood

German Oddity 15. Germany is a place where huge underground bombs are routinely unearthed all around the country and this barely even makes second page news. In fact, most Germans directly affected are more annoyed about it than anything else. They grudgingly leave their homes until the bomb crews have disarmed or detonated the damned things. Over 5,000 bombs are found in Germany every year.

Bomb

1,100-pound US bomb from WWII defused in Germany after mass evacuation.

Verzögerte Räumung, schnelle Entschärfung.

German Of The Day: Entlassungswelle

That means wave of layoffs.

Bank

Although the plural form would be more accurate these days. It’s the latest big thing in Germany. Everybody’s doing it – or in the process of planning it (see German automobile industry).

Take the Deutsche Bank, for instance. Give me 18,000 employees to go. The times they are a changin’.

Up to 20,000 jobs could be axed at Deutsche Bank in a radical reorganisation of Germany’s biggest bank.

The investment bank is expected to be particularly hard hit, with many of the cuts set to affect London and New York.

“I can assure you: we’re prepared to make tough cutbacks.”

The Next German Folk Hero Is Born

For fifteen minutes or so, at least.

Folk Hero

Carola Rackete has been lauded as a heroine and decried as a criminal for helping asylum-seekers stranded in the Mediterranean Sea. What drives the 31-year-old German captain of the Sea-Watch rescue boat?

That’s easy. It’s the drug she’s taking: Guilt. Guilt gets people high. At least here in Germany it does. Guilt-induced moral intoxication turns its users from nobodies minding their own business into moral supermen saving the world. Those they claim to help are of secondary importance.

“I have decided to enter the port of Lampedusa. I know what I’m risking, but the 42 rescued people are exhausted. I’m taking them to safety now.”

German Of The Day: Heimlicher Wortbruch

That means secret breach of promise.

Wortbruch

Mr Trump accused Berlin of falling short of its NATO commitments during a meeting with Polish President Andrzej Duda at the White House yesterday (June 12). The US President demanded that they increase their defence spending from one percent to two percent of gross domestic product (GDP).

NATO set a target for every member to spend two percent of GDP on defence by 2024.

But Berlin has only pledged to increase spending to 1.5 percent by that date.

Deutschlands heimlicher Wortbruch gegenüber der Nato.

And You Thought Paying Back Your Student Loan Was A Bitch

And I’m sure it was but…

Debt

Germany’s World War I Debt Was So Crushing It Took 92 Years to Pay Off – After the Treaty of Versailles called for punishing reparations, economic collapse and another world war thwarted Germany’s ability to pay…

The Allies exacted reparations for World War II, too. They weren’t paid in actual money, but through industrial dismantling, the removal of intellectual property and forced labor for millions of German POWs. After the surrender, Germany was divided into four occupation zones, and in 1949 the country was split in two. Economic recovery, much less reparations payments, seemed unlikely.

By then, West Germany owed 30 billion Deutschmarks to 70 different countries, according to Deutsche Welle’s Andreas Becker, and was in desperate need of cash. But an unexpected ray of hope broke through when West Germany’s president, Konrad Adenauer, struck a deal with a variety of western nations in 1953. The London Debt Conference canceled half of Germany’s debt and extended payment deadlines. And because West Germany was required to pay only when it had a trade surplus, the agreement gave breathing room for economic expansion.

Soon, West Germany, bolstered by Marshall Plan aid and relieved of most of its reparations burden, was Europe’s fastest-growing economy. This “economic miracle” helped stabilize the economy, and the new plan used the potential of reparations payments to encourage countries to trade with West Germany.

Still, it took decades for Germany to pay off the rest of its reparations debt. At the London Conference, West Germany argued it shouldn’t be responsible for all of the debt the old Germany had incurred during World War I, and the parties agreed that part of its back interest wouldn’t become due until Germany reunified. Once that happened, Germany slowly chipped away at the last bit of debt. It made its last debt payment on October 3, 2010—the 20th anniversary of German reunification.

The German (Political) Psyche In A Nutshell

Or everyday German schizophrenia in action, if you prefer – in this case with regard to  Germany’s famous/infamous green energy policy.

Energy

“Germany is not a trendsetter. Germany is a dependent tag behind. Gas will come from Russia in the future while we impose sanctions on the Russians at the same time. Electricity will come from nuclear reactors and coal-fired power stations in neighboring countries while we simultaneously disparage them for being environmental villeins. Security will be provided by the NATO partner USA who we permanently abuse in the most savage manner. Sadly, political Germany suffers from megalomania and ineptitude at the same time. If one wants something, one finds a way. If one doesn’t want something, one finds the reasons.”

Deutschland ist nicht Vorreiter. Deutschland ist abhängiger Hinterherhinker. Gas kommt künftig aus Russland, das gleichzeitig mit Sanktionen behängt wird. Strom kommt künftig aus den Atomreaktoren und Kohlekraftwerken der Nachbarländer, die gleichzeitig als Umweltsünder und Schrottreaktoren verunglimpft werden. Sicherheit kommt vom NATO-Partner USA, der permanent aufs Übelste beschimpft wird. Das politische Deutschland leidet leider an Größenwahn, gepaart mit Unfähigkeit. Wer etwas will, findet Wege. Wer etwas nicht will, findet Gründe.

Two Down, One To Go

After yesterday’s tragic crash of two Eurofighters during a training mission over Northern Germany, the German Luftwaffe is down to one operational plane of that design.

Air Force

But they are really, really good planes, we are told. Again and again. Top of the line state of the art. But state of the art isn’t even good enough these days, especially when most of them don’t even fly. That’s why the Eurofighter is now to be replaced with the “Future Combat Air System.” This one won’t have to leave the ground, either, I assume, which will make things a lot easier. It will just beam to the future and do its future combat fighting there.

Nach Unglück: Hat die Luftwaffe wirklich nur noch einen einsatzfähigen „Eurofighter“?

German Of The Day: Eigentum

That means property. But property doesn’t mean much in Germany anymore. At least not in Berlin under its current “red-red-green” city government.

Property

Another word you might be interested in here is Enteignung.

German officials facing protests and endless complaints about threats to affordable housing in the nation’s capital have decided the solution may be a five-year ban on rent increases and fines as high as $550,000 for violators.

Officials in Berlin, a city of about 3.7 million residents long known for its affordable housing options, announced this week that they plan to temporarily freeze the rents charged on publicly and privately owned apartments in a bid to halt runaway gentrification.

“It will scare away investors who will find alternative markets with less regulation. It’s a socialist and populist attack on the free market and it’s not going to lead to a single new apartment being built.”

 

You Didn’t Sit While Peeing!

And I warned you twice, Hermann. Now I’m gonna beat you black and blue.

Hurt

After millennia of callous neglect, Germany is finally prepared to address the scandalous issue of domestic violence against German men. And addressing it, as if it actually existed, is precisely what makes this all so scandalous. Talk about wussies, sheesh. Beam me up pronto, Scottie. It’s a freakin’ nuthouse here.

For the first time ever, two German states are launching an initiative to help male victims of domestic violence. Officials in Bavaria and North Rhine-Westphalia say they want to break the taboos surrounding the topic.

A three-pillar program to help men suffering from domestic violence was unveiled by the German states of Bavaria and North Rhine-Westphalia (NRW) on Tuesday.

The first pillar of the initiative would include a hotline and an online counseling platform for victims. The second pillar would see constructions of safe houses and counseling centers. Finally, the authorities aim to make the subject of violence against men “visible” and “break the taboo” surrounding it.

“Until now, there was hardly any help or support structures. There are possibilities to cooperate across state borders, most of all in creating a hotline and in the area of online counseling.”