SPD To Announce Candidate Later

November 21, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: CDU, Elections, German, Germans, Germany, Merkel, SPD Leave a comment

Now that Angela Merkel has opened the campaign for next year’s parliamentary elections in Germany by announcing her intention to run for a fourth term, the folks over at the SPD have made it clear that they intend to wait until they are good and ready before announcing their candidate, probably sometime in 2018.

They don’t have a candidate who has a chance in hell, get it?*

Am Montagmorgen hatte SPD-Vize Ralf Stegner erklärt, die SPD werde “bald” über ihren Kandidaten befinden.

*Chancellors aren’t directly elected here, of course, but the SPD is now an under-20%-party.

German Of The Day: Multikulti

November 20, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: AfD, CDU, Elections, German, Germans, Germany, Language, Merkel, Political Parties, Politics 2 Comments

That means multiculti, as in multicultural. And this is a word that is suddenly “out” for Angela Merkel’s CDU, for some inexplicable reason.

But to compensate for the loss, Modernisierungsverlierer (modernization losers) is now officially “in” with them. And just in case you were wondering, we are once again moving into election season in Germany and these “losers” are the same ones who have helped parties like the AfD become “winners” in recent years. Sounds vaguely familiar somehow but I can’t seem to put my finger on it at the moment.

Im Entwurf für den Leitantrag, der beim Parteitag Anfang Dezember beschlossen werden soll, sprechen die Christdemokraten ausdrücklich jene Bürger an, “die sich als Modernisierungsverlierer sehen und derzeit noch bei populistischen Parteien von rechts und links ihre Zuflucht suchen”.

Egyptians Better At This, Too

November 17, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Humor Tags: Climate Change, CO2, German, Germans, Germany, Rankings, Studies Leave a comment

Not only do Egyptians beat Germans when it comes to completing building projects (German construction sites are built to last and last and last), they are also better than the Germans when it comes to reducing CO2 emission levels (and they don’t preach about it all day long while they’re doing it like the Germans do, either).

A new ranking of how well countries are working to limit climate change shows that Germany has fallen behind countries like Egypt and Mexico to 29th place worldwide.

PS: But when it comes to completing construction site projects, not even the Egyptians can whop the Japanese.

And You Thought The Next President Of The United States Was A Real Shocker

November 14, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy Tags: Elections, German, Germans, Germany, President, SPD, Steinmeier Leave a comment

It could be worse. You could live here in Germany.

Well at least they don’t let the people vote for their presidents here. This guy, Mr. Diplomat, is now going to become Mr. President. Talk about a mediocrity, a sheep in sheep’s clothing and all that. He is the living, breathing Spiegel Gutmensch in person. Only he’s not really a real person in reality. He’s more like that Abraham Lincoln robot dude I remember seeing once at Disneyland when I was a kid, only this one can walk. And talk at the same time, sort of (forget the chewing bubble gum at the same time part, though). It’s best if you turn off the volume whenever he starts talking, however. It’s more like a whine. And I don’t mean a fine whine, either.

That’s right. In other words he’ll be the perfect president for Germany.

Steinmeier (SPD), backed by many German industry leaders, academics and cultural leaders, raised concerns among U.S. and NATO officials earlier this year when he said a series of Western military exercises in eastern Europe could be seen as “saber-rattling” against Russia.

Nobody Has The Intention Of Building A Wall

November 7, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: Berlin Wall, German, Germans, Germany, Migrants, Munich, Refugees, Walls 1 Comment

Like, duh. That’s because it’s already been built.

A 12-foot high barrier – higher than the Berlin Wall – is being erected in the German city of Munich to protect locals from young refugees who are set to move into the area.

Sie hatten wirklich keine Vorahnung?

German Engineering At Its Finest

November 6, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Hi-tech, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Audi, CO2, Deception, Defeat Devices, Dieselgate, Fraud, German, Germans, Germany, Language, Technology, VW Leave a comment

Fortschritt durch Technik. That’s Audi’s motto and means progress through technology.

And their latest advance in defeat device technology is a great step forward in consumer deception indeed.

Audi’s defeat device, camouflaged as a warm-up function, keys in on movements of the steering wheel to detect if the car is in the lab or not. Once in normal traffic, however, this warm-up function is deactivated and the vehicle switches to a higher fuel consumption mode, thus producing more CO2. Brilliant, don’t you think?

Come on, America. Why can’t you produce technology like this? These new fangled electric cars everybody is talking about these days don’t have any of this cool stuff.

So schummelte Audi bei CO² – Mit einer Software sollen Messergebnisse manipuliert worden sein.

I Can See For Miles

November 3, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, Climate Protection, Environment, EU, German, Germans, Germany, Infringements, Smog Leave a comment

Or at least for a kilometer or two.

Germany likes to see itself as a pioneer when dealing with environmental issues, but when it comes to implementing European standards, Berlin is hardly a poster child.

The European Union has opened 16 infringement procedures in total against Germany, for failing to implement environmental legislation on time or even at all.

And then there is: Shock…Germany To Come To Marrakesh Conference Empty-Handed! Withdraws Climate Protection Plan! Thanks for the tweet, Joe.

Young Germans Shamelessly Copying Americans Again

November 2, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: German, Germans, Germany, Media, Political Institutions, Politics, Polls, Religion, Skepticism, Studies, Surveys 1 Comment

Or at least that’s what the latest “Generation What?” survey taken by a German media group indicates to me: More than 70 percent of the young people here have no confidence in politics.

When asked about political institutions, only 27 percent replied that they “more or less” had confidence in them. Only one percent asked said they trusted these institutions completely.

They were nearly as skeptical when it came to confidence in religious institutions and in the media itself.

Mehr als 70 Prozent der jungen Menschen ohne Vertrauen in die Politik.

Germans Now Allowed To Watch So-Called “Music Videos”

November 1, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: Copyright, GEMA, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Music Videos, YouTube Leave a comment

Damn. The down side here is that this is finally going to let South Sudan pass Germany by. When it comes to blocking online music videos, I mean.

The internet video platform YouTube and the German rights collection society GEMA have reached a deal under which artists who are GEMA members will receive payment when one of their videos is viewed, both sides announced on Tuesday. The agreement also brings an end to the red “blocking banners” notifying users in Germany that access to their favorite music was banned for copyright reasons.

“Ab heute geht’s los. Also habt bitte einen Moment Geduld, wenn noch nicht alle Videos sofort verfügbar sind.”

German Of The Day: Kleiner Waffenschein

October 30, 2016 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Cologne, German, Germans, Germany, Guns, Hamburg, ISIS, Language, Refugees, Self-Defense, Terror, Terrorists, Weapons 1 Comment

That means small firearms license. And the number of these licenses just keeps on climbing here in Germany (an increase from 301,000 to 402,000 during the first six months of this year).

Gee. I wonder why?

Please note: These are licenses to carry guns that fire gas cartridges or blank rounds only. We don’t want to hurt the guy trying to kill us here or anything.

Der Anstieg setzte nach den Übergriffen der Silvesternacht in Köln ein.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

Category Archives: Hard Facts