Category Archives: Home Cooking

“Syria Tests Germany’s Culture of Reluctance?”

August 31, 2013 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, High Art, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypochondria, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

Reluctance? No reluctance here. Saying no is the standard German operating procedure in this country. You know that, Karl-Theodor. It’s just good-old German irresponsibility when it comes to international matters that might actually cost them something.

Syria

So what’s being “tested?” I don’t get it. Why waste all these words and all this time trying to make something so blood simple appear to be so complicated, Karl-Theodor? No need to explain. This is standard operationg procedure in Germany, too.

In the wake of the chemical weapons attack near Damascus, Western military strikes against Syria seem imminent. And Germany will once again demand a special role.

PS: Important German of the day here: Extrawurst. That means “extra wurst” of course, or special treatment.

German of the Day: Veggie-Klatsch

August 28, 2013 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

A smack upside they green veggie heads, in other words.

Veggie

If you believe the latest voter survey, that’s what the German Greens are getting at the moment.

Seems to have something to do with their recent Veggie Day Offensive. Or maybe it has something to do with their overall everyday offensiveness or another one of their many other offensive ambitious dreams for Verbotsrepublik Deutschland. Hard to say for sure.

NEUE WÄHLER-UMFRAGE SCHOCKT TRITTIN & CO.

Greens Loudly Denounce Disastrous Legislative Blunder Made By Awful German Government Coalition Currently In Power

August 27, 2013 By in Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , Leave a comment

Only this blunder was made by the Greens themselves during the Red-Green coalition government reign back in 2005.

Green

Hard to believe really, but their 328-page election program “Time for Green Change” actually denounces as “a fatal policy change” the legislation they themselves introduced that increased the percentage of what employees have to pay for their share of the statutory health insurance here (employers pay the rest).

Well, I suppose it is better to realize one’s mistakes late than never and all that, but I’m not sure if that is really what was intended here.

If it wasn’t for Schadenfreude, I wouldn’t have no Freude at all.

“Bei all den erhobenen Zeigefingern gegenüber den anderen scheint kein Finger mehr für saubere Recherche im eigenen Laden frei gewesen zu sein.”

Makes Sense To Me

August 25, 2013 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

“US Experts Want More Leadership from Germany”

There hasn’t been any leadership in the US for about five years now. Somebody ought to start doing  it one of these days.

Obama in Berlin

Germans aren’t the only ones with interests at stake in next month’s election. The US is watching too — and Washington is hoping that, once the campaign is history, Germany will show more leadership on global issues.

“I think the assumption Americans have is that Germany should always step up and take responsibility commensurate with its weight in the world.”

PS: There was yet another anomaly in the GCG (Gun Control Germany) yesterday.

It’s Good To Be In A Crisis

August 23, 2013 By in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, High Art, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Money is like water (or maybe like beer). It has to go somewhere. And 40 billion euros just made its way to Germany.

Crisis

While fear has driven money away from Greece and Spain and co, making the government cost of repaying debt in these countries seem prohibitive, in Germany it has been quite different. Fear has boosted Germany coffers…

One thing is for sure, putting it in Greek bonds is risky. Spanish, Italian and Portuguese bonds don’t seem much safer either. But German bonds, in contrast, feel as safe as a safe house in a land with no crime. In fact so safe are German government bonds or bunds, perceived to be, that there have been times when the yields on some of them have been negative.

So actually, Germany has done rather well out of fear created by the euro crisis – or should that be the other way around – a euro crisis created by fear?

German Of The Day: Bausünde

August 18, 2013 By in Habitudes, Heconomy, Helplessness, High Art, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

Bausünden are building sins. Or building blunders? Or architectural abberations? Whatever. Berlin knows how. It’s just what they do here.

Sin

Photographer Turit Fröbe has now published an illustrated book about some of the most awful abberations, which must have been pretty difficult to compile. I mean, there is just too much to chose from here.

I love them all, by the way. The more sinful the better.

“Gute Bausünden zu finden, ist viel schwerer, als man denkt.”

There Are No Jokes

August 16, 2013 By in Habitudes, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, High Art, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Humor, Hypochondria, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Well, actually there are. But in this case I’m not so sure.

Tourists

The satirical political party “Die Partei” gathered Thursday at Berlin’s Brandenburg Gate to debut its latest campaign demand: eradicating tourists from the German capital.

The protest is a play on a debate in recent years in Berlin on how mass tourism threatens to transform the Brandenburg Gate, an important historical site in the city, into a a cheap Disneyland-like attraction.

Ob Ost, ob West, nieder mit der Touri-Pest!

Strange German News Blackout Going On Right Now Sort Of

August 15, 2013 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

No one here seems particularly interested that a fifty-year-old man shot his wife and daughter in Essen yesterday. His daughter died. His wife might yet. Didn’t anybody ever bother to tell this creep that Germany has some of the strictest gun control laws in the world?

Guns

Nor is anyone all that concerned about the fact that the UPS cargo aircraft that crashed in Alabama yesterday was an Airbus A300 freighter (thanks, Murph). I’m not so sure that would be the case if the aircraft had been manufactured by Boeing.

There are just more imporant things out there to report about these days, I guess.

“It would be inappropriate for Airbus to enter into any form of speculation into the cause of the accident.”

PS: Catastrophic climate change 3,200 years ago? But where did they get all their CO2 from?

German Job Wonder So Wunderbar That Millions Of Germans Have Two

August 14, 2013 By in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , 4 Comments

Or need to have two, I should say.

Zweitjob

Nearly 3 million Germans or over 9 percent of those working full-time are now working part-time as well.

Nope, it’s not because Germans are particularly fleißig (hardworking). This German job wonder that everybody envies so much over here, like everything else in life, comes with a price. The income from many of these wunderjobs is simply no longer enough to get by on. Kein Auskommen mit dem Einkommen (can’t make out with what comes in), or something like that.

Ist es pure Not oder der Wunsch, sich mehr leisten zu können?

Right On Time

August 12, 2013 By in Habitudes, Helplessness, High Art, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Humor, Hypochondria, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

This is definitely one of my favorite rituals over here. Like the reliable old groundhog back home, at least one weird animal sighting is guaranteed to take place in Germany during the so-called Sommerloch season.

Lotti

This year’s winner is a terrifying alligator snapping turtle that actually attacked a young swimmer in Bavaria somewhere. Or maybe he didn’t. But still.

Like I said, this happens over here every year. Here are just a few examples. Who says that “news” isn’t a product that you can just turn on and off at will? Depending upon the demand, I mean. Which obviously seems to be pretty low at the moment (it’s a Sommerloch, like I said).

And all of these scary monsters have one other thing in common, too: They never get caught. Some böse Zungen (malicious tongues) even suggest that these creatures don’t even really, you know, exist?

The turtle, nicknamed Lotti, is likely to be some 40cm (16 inches) long and weigh at least 14kg (30 pounds).