Volkswagen, Audi, Daimler…

July 13, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Audi, Corruption, Crime, Daimler, Dieselgate, German, Germans, Germany, Volkswagen Leave a comment

There seems to be a connection here somewhere but I just can’t find it.

Oh, yeah. Now I know: Diesel.

A German media research consortium reported Wednesday that German automaker Daimler, the maker of Mercedes-Benz cars, had for almost 10 years cheated emissions tests on two of its lines of engines. The allegations prompted a series of raids carried by German authorities on a number of Daimler locations back in May.

And all of this was financed by the Deutsche Bank, right?

“Wir kooperieren vollumfänglich mit den Behörden. Spekulationen kommentieren wir nicht.”

When Politically Motivated Anti-Globalization Activists Get Active

July 9, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Anarchy, Capitalism, Crime, G20, German, Germans, Germany, Globalization, Hamburg, Protest, Violence 3 Comments

Big capitalists like this store owner have to pay.

“This proves that capitalism doesn’t work,” one masked activist with a Z sprayed on his chest explained. “Any system that would let people like us destroy this guy’s capital with impunity simply ain’t got no future.”

I’m finally starting to see the light, people. This is what a world without globalization would look like. The annoymous theft and destruction would only take place locally.

Ihr Ideal? „China vor 1976“, sagt einer.

German Of The Day: Deutsche Bank

July 7, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Audi, Cheating, Corruption, Crime, Deutsche Bank, Dieselgate, German, Germans, Germany, Language, North Korea, Volkswagen Leave a comment

That means German Bank.

And it’s getting hard to find a financial scandal that this bank is not involved in. When it comes to corruption and criminal activity, it’s the Volkswagen among the banks, you could say. Or the Audi, if you prefer.

Today’s criminal activity: U.S. authorities have tried to seize millions of dollars associated with several companies that deal with North Korea, including the country’s military, from eight large international banks, according to court filings made public on Thursday. Deutsche Bank is among them.

Some of the transactions were processed for Dandong Zhicheng Metallic Material Co and four affiliated “front” companies that prosecutors said tried to evade sanctions through transactions that would benefit North Korean entities, “including the North Korea military and North Korea weapons programs,” according to the filings.

Amerikanische Staatsanwälte haben die Deutsche Bank und sieben weitere Banken im Visier. Der Grund: Sie sollen Geschäfte mit nordkoreanischen Tarnfirmen gemacht haben.

My Guess Is Argentina

June 23, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: Crime, Dieselgate, Fraud, German, Germans, Germany, Law, Punishment, Swindle, Volkswagen 2 Comments

US authorities have issued international arrest warrants for five former VW managers and developers for their role in the Dieselgate scandal.

Nobody in Germany can seem to find them so, you know, just put two and two together. No, that doesn’t make five. But it comes close.

Under the constitution, German citizens can only be extradited to other European Union countries or to an international court. But leaving Germany could pose the risk of being extradited to the United States from a third country.

“Erwartbare Konsequenz.”

More Tough Sentencing In Germany

June 15, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Asylum Seekers, Berlin, Courts, Crime, David Hasselhoff Museum, Judges, Law, Punishment, Refugees Leave a comment

The state court in Berlin convicted a group of young refugees from Syria and Libya on Tuesday who attempted to set fire to a sleeping homeless man at a subway station on Christmas last year. The oldest of the group, a 21-year-old Syrian man, was sentenced to two years and nine months in prison.

I guess the judges were being lenient like in that recent case in Cottbus. In Muslim countries it’s apparently OK to light people on fire so that needed to be taken into consideration, I assume.

But seriously, if were up to me and I were a judge here in Berlin I’d lock them up in the David Hasselhoff Museum and throw away the key.

No Joke

June 11, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Horror Tags: 1984, Big Brother, Crime, Facebook, Fines, German, Germans, Germany, Hate Crime, Jokes, Law, Punishment, Refugees, Thoughtcrime 1 Comment

Little old ladies just don’t seem to understand the world we are now living in. Not that I do, either. But still.

In Germany, you can be arrested and fined €1,350 for finding jokes like these funny (and then sharing it on your Facebook page): “Do you have anything against refugees? Yes. Machine guns and hand grenades.”

And using some lame excuse like “I like to pass on funny things” won’t help you out here one little bit, ma’am. You are guilty of hate crime. Hate crime, you ask? What is hate crime? Well, hate crime, when it comes to jokes, is kind of like thoughtcrime only… No, wait. It is thoughtcrime. That’s precisely what it is. Now just sit back and relax, ma’am. We will purge that abominable joke from your mind with the help of this little red button right here.

„Ich leite gern spaßige Sachen weiter.”

Who’s Your Daddy?

June 6, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax) Tags: Berlin, Crime, German, Germans, Germany, Immigrants, Law, Paternity, Pregnancy, Scams 1 Comment

The German birth rate is suddenly spiking or something. I knew you could do it, guys.

German officials say growing numbers of pregnant immigrant women are paying German men to pose as fathers so that they can qualify for residency.

German broadcaster RBB found up to 700 cases in Berlin alone. “There are many unreported cases,” said Ole Schröder, a top interior ministry official.

Some pregnant immigrant women are reported to have paid fake fathers and solicitors as much as €5,000 (£4,356; $5,628) to get paternity registered. Once that is done, the baby automatically becomes a German citizen and the mother has the right to stay.

“Wir haben teilweise Personen, die über zehn Vaterschaften annerkannt haben.”

German Of The Day: Handkreissäge

May 19, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Horror, Hurt Feelings Tags: Crime, German, Germans, Germany, Language, Murder, Saws, Sex Leave a comment

That means skill saw or portable circular saw.

And you really need to have a lot of skill when you operate one of those things. Or you ought to. It’s hard to say whether this lady knew what she was doing when she was operating hers, though.

A court in southern Germany has convicted a 32-year-old woman of killing her boyfriend and severing his head with a circular saw. Prosecutors said she attacked her boyfriend while he was tied to a bed and blindfolded with blacked-out swim goggles, then decapitated him, probably after he died from wounds to the upper body.

My bet is she never saw sex like that before.

City Of Berlin Files Criminal Complaint Against City of Berlin’s Police Department

May 18, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Anis Amri, Berlin, Corruption, Cover-Up, Crime, German, Germans, Germany, Police, Terrorism 1 Comment

Just another example of how Berlin works. Or doesn’t work, I should say.

German authorities are investigating explosive new allegations of a police cover-up over Anis Amri, the Berlin Christmas market attacker. The Berlin regional government has filed criminal charges against two of its own police officers alleging they falsified documents to cover up a missed opportunity to arrest Amri more than a month before the attack.

But seeing how absolutely nothing ever works here, there will be some legal technicality or something else along those lines that will screw up these criminal charges. But not to worry. Because seeing how absolutely nothing ever works here, the alleged cover-up will not have properly covered up what they were trying to cover up, either. The truth always raises its ugly little head. Even in Berlin.

“Es gibt keine Garantie, dass er auch in Haft gekommen wäre.”

German Of The Day: Kriminalstatistik

April 23, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Asylum Seekers, Crime, German, Germans, Germany, Media, Migrants, Refugees, Statistics, Taliban, Terrorists Leave a comment

That means crime statistics. And the statistic that just came out about suspected criminal refugees in Germany rose 52.7 percent between 2015 and 2016 – to 174,438.

If this were all just petty crime that would be bad enough but Germany’s Federal Office for Migration and Refugees (BAMF) says now that thousands of migrants had identified themselves as former Taliban insurgents during the asylum application process. At least they were honest, right? My, Germany certainly has a generous immigration policy.

So there are more criminal refugees here than anybody figured? How you figure? That must be some kind of mistake. All the popular media outlets have been suggesting the opposite. And still are, for that matter.

Zahl der tatverdächtigen Zuwanderer steigt um 52,7 Prozent.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

Tag Archives: Crime