German Of The Day: Erfolglos

June 10, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Business, German, Germans, Germany, Industry, Iran, Money, Nuclear Agreement, Profit, Tehran Leave a comment

And while we’re at it, fassungslos und ahnungslos.

That means unsuccessful, stunned and clueless, respectively. And all three apply to Germany’s foreign minister Heiko Maas, who just got a taste of the real world in Tehran during his pitiful attempt to salvage what is left of the 2015 nuclear agreement with Iran – for world peace, of course (and for German corporate interests in the region, coincidentally).

The German foreign minister appeared somehow surprised to discover that the mullahs are upset with Europe as “so far, we have not seen practical and tangible steps from the Europeans to guarantee Iran’s interests.” This is because, well, they can’t. If you aim at being weak long and hard enough then weak you shall be. But there’s a bright side to this, I guess. German diplomacy would not be German diplomacy without the foreign ministers fervent hope that “ways can be found to reduce current tensions through dialogue.” Good luck with that, Heiko.

By the way, anybody in Germany who repeats the word “dialogue” long and hard enough can become German foreign minister, too.

Außenminister Maas in Iran – Zwischen erfolglos und fassungslos.

Germany To Lead From Behind Again

June 9, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hostility, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: Business, Diplomacy, German, Germans, Germany, Heiko Maas, Iran, Israel, Money, Nuclear Arms Deal, Profit, SPD, USA Leave a comment

This time from far behind. You know, like from way, way, way far behind? But still.

Germany looks to ‘lead’ US-Iran talks– in what is clearly a noble effort to bring peace to the region and profits to the German corporations still sexually aroused about doing business with Iran despite the collapse of the 2015 nuclear agreement – and, of course, to take an indirect swipe at Israel in the process while they’re at it already.

“The latest escalation requires us as European neighbors to intervene in favor of de-escalation and peaceful coexistence,” German Foreign Minister Heiko Maas told reporters during an unannounced stop to Iraq. “We cannot just seek dialogue, we must lead it, precisely where the differences seem insurmountable and long-simmering conflicts run deep.”

“Das ist eine Reise in die Krise.”

Why Did The German Warship Cross The Taiwan Straight?

June 7, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy Tags: Defense, Defense Spending, German, Germans, Germany, Military, NATO, Navy Leave a comment

To get to the other side? To get repaired?

No. To 1) show the world that it actually has a warship, 2) demonstrate that it can actually travel this far without sinking or being towed and 3) demonstrate Germany’s formidable military power. No, all three are true. You don’t have to pick just one. But remember folks, this is all a purely hypothetical construct.

Why a German Warship Would Head To the Taiwan Strait – A naval mission to the region would be a low-risk way for Germany to show that it’s committed to alliances – and that it still has a navy.

No low-risk, no fun.

I’ll Go With “Systematic Issue”

June 6, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Bayer, Deutsche Bank, German, Germans, Germany, Industry, Volkswagen 1 Comment

Specifically, it’s a systematic decline caused by systematic dishonesty and corruption.

The simultaneous decline of Volkswagen, Deutsche Bank (DB), and Bayer has been nothing short of stunning. It raises the question as to whether it is merely coincidence, or if there is a larger systemic issue in play.

At Harvard’s 368th Commencement this past Thursday, German Chancellor Angela Merkel spoke of her life experiences growing up during the Cold War in post World War II Europe.

On this cool and overcast day, she also gave advice to the graduates on how to live their lives. She obliquely mentioned the trade war and indirectly criticized President Donald Trump — which got a round of applause. She even quoted the German poet, Hermann Hesse, saying “in all beginnings dwells a magic force for guarding us and helping us to live.”

There was one topic, however, that Merkel didn’t broach, perhaps not surprising given the celebratory nature of the day. Merkel made no mention of the economic dysfunction and even decay that seems to be infecting Germany — particularly when it comes to Germany’s largest and most prominent companies. The simultaneous decline of Volkswagen, Deutsche Bank (DB), and Bayer has been nothing short of stunning. It raises the question as to whether it is merely coincidence, or if there is a larger systemic issue in play. Either way, something is rotten in the state of Germany.

Siggi Has A Blackout

June 5, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Health, Helplessness, Hideology, Hostility, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: China, Donald Trump, German, Germans, Germany, Iraq, ISIS, North Korea, Politicians, Sigmar Gabriel, Social Democracy, Socialists, SPD, Syria, Terror, Trump Derangement Syndrome Leave a comment

Clearly still under shock after his party’s latest crisis, the SPD’s ex-boss Gabriel just accidentally praised Donald Trump.

Needless to say he was immediately rushed to the nearest hospital and is currently under observation – and very strong medication.

German center-left SPD’s ex-leader Gabriel gives Trump praise – The US president is right to criticize China and to negotiate with North Korea, according to left-of-center former Foreign Minister Sigmar Gabriel. Gabriel also warned against seeing Trump voters as “dummies.”

“His criticism of China is justified, and so is his courage to negotiate with North Korea. And he is also right when he calls on Germany and Europe to get their terror-supporting citizens out of Syria and Iraq and put them on trial, instead of letting the Kurds deal with it.”

This Gives “Building Boom” A Whole New Meaning

June 4, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Berlin, Bombs, Building Boom, German, Germans, Germany, WWII Leave a comment

In a Building Boom, German Cities Face Renewed Threats From WWII Bombs – More than 70 years after the war ended, unexploded bombs are being unearthed with remarkable regularity.

Bombs are being found with “remarkable regularity” now? It’s never been any different here.

German Oddity 15. Germany is a place where huge underground bombs are routinely unearthed all around the country and this barely even makes second page news. In fact, most Germans directly affected are more annoyed about it than anything else. They grudgingly leave their homes until the bomb crews have disarmed or detonated the damned things. Over 5,000 bombs are found in Germany every year.

German Government “Sways?”

June 3, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy Tags: Andrea Nahles, Bermany, German, Germans, Grand Coalition, Political Parties, Social Democracy, SPD 2 Comments

Of course it sways. That’s all it’s ever done as long as Angela Merkel has been in power.

The latest “grand coalition” that nobody here wants anyway is now swaying to its end, it seems. Or maybe it isn’t. Let’s see. Whatever. But at the latest once the SPD disappears completely from the stage of history there won’t be anybody “grand” enough left to keep this grand coalition farce going.

German Government Sways After Social Democrat Leader Quits – German Chancellor Angela Merkel vowed Sunday to continue with her government after the leader of the center-left Social Democrats, a junior partner in the coalition, resigned following a series of disappointing election results.

In a surprise announcement hours earlier, Andrea Nahles had announced she planned to quit, saying she wanted “clarity” after questions were raised about her ability to lead the Social Democrats. The party finished third in last month’s European Parliament election, receiving 15.8% of the vote behind Merkel’s center-right Union bloc with 28.9% and the Greens with 20.5%.

“The party is in an extremely serious situation. If we don’t manage to stick together and find a way out of it then things will look really bleak.”

Berlin Isn’t An Anti-Semitic City

June 2, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hate, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Al-Quds March, Anti-Americanism, Anti-Israel, Anti-Semitism, Berlin, Demonstrations, German, Germans, Germany, Iran, Palestinians Leave a comment

It’s just a city that openly supports groups that openly call for the destruction of Israel.

Berlin’s city government (the ususal suspects – SPD, Greens, Left Party) has imposed upon the populace yet again another grade A anti-Israel agitation celebration organized and financed by the mullah regime in Iran.

Germany’s anti-Semitism debate raises its head at pro-Palestinian march in Berlin – Pro-Palestinian and pro-Israel demonstrators peacefully marched in Berlin amid a struggle to define the line between criticism of Israel and anti-Semitism.

Wieder einmal muss die Hauptstadt die vom Iran organisierte Hetze gegen Israel während der Kuds-Demo ertragen.

A Standing Ovation For An Anti-Trump Speech?

May 31, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helplessness, Hideology, Higher Education, Hostility, Humor, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Angela Merkel, Donald Trump, German, Germans, Germany, Harvard, Speeches, Universities 2 Comments

At an American University? Wow. Now that’s news-worthy.

Or at least the Germans seem to think it is. Yawn.

Angela Merkel urged Harvard graduates Thursday to “tear down walls of ignorance and narrow-mindedness” in a speech laced with apparent jibes at Donald Trump and his policies.

Though she did not name the U.S. president, the German chancellor devoted much of her Harvard University commencement speech to attacking major pillars of Trump’s presidency: protectionism, trade wars and building walls.

Merkel in Harvard: Für die Anti-Trump-Rede gibt es Standing Ovations

German Of The Day: Andere Länder Andere Sitten

May 30, 2019 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor Tags: Beer, Customs, Father's Day, German, Germans, Germany, Holidays, Language, Vatertag Leave a comment

That means other countries other customs.

Finally, a holiday for the rest of us.

German Oddity 391. Only in Germany is Vatertag or Father’s Day commemorated by hordes of oddly dressed men pulling little wooden wagons overloaded with beer and snaps through wooded areas (or right through the middle of your town) roaring and swearing and pissing all over the place until they vomit on themselves and pass out but not before having called their wives to pick them up and drag them back home again.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

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