No More Döner For Dinner?

November 30, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Bureaucracy, Döner Kebab, EU, Food, German, Germans, Germany, Regulations 6 Comments

Huh? That’s absolutely, positively my favorite German food!

Leave it up to the Enlightened Left to help protect us from ourselves again.

The EU’s Umweltausschuss (ecology committee) plans to restrict the use of phosphates in frozen meats. A loophole in their legislation had allowed frozen Döner Kebab to contain phosphates up until now. Only fresh Döner will be allowed to have phosphates in the future.

The problem here: Almost all of the Döner restaurants in Europe depend upon frozen Döner meat being delivered to them. Some 500 tons of it are eaten every day. 80% of that in Germany. Over 110,000 jobs would be affected. And please note: The same EU bureaucrats (from another EU department, of course) have declared that 4200 mg of phosphates per day does not pose a health hazard. A Döner Kebab has on average 134 mg.

What can you say? What else can you say? “I’m from the government and I’m here to help.”

Wegen Sozialisten und Grünen im EU-Parlament – Dem Döner droht das Aus!

German Of The Day: Parallelgesellschaften

November 28, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Integration, Islam, Migrants, Necla Kelek, Refugees Leave a comment

That means parallel societies.

And this migration research lady, Necla Kelek, a Muslim herself, believes that Familiennachzug or family reunification policies (bringing in the families of the refugee men who came to Germany alone) would contribute to forming these parallel societies – and put a swift end to all the integration efforts the “correct” Germans out there are all so concerned about. You know, that same old been there done that good intentions blowing up in your face stuff?

At least folks like her are allowed to have this opinion.

Familiennachzug fördert Parallelgesellschaften.

SPD Unsure About Which False Move To Make Next

November 22, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Angela Merkel, Elections, FDP, German, Germans, Germany, SPD 2 Comments

As in being worst. False moves are the only kind of moves Germany’s SPD makes these days.

Now that the Jamaica negotiations went tango uniform….

Bloodied but proud and steeped in tradition and legacy, the SPD thought it had done the right thing after September’s devastating election result by announcing its desire to regroup as the main opposition party in the new German parliament…

But if the SPD sticks to its opposition role now, its detractors might accuse the party of leaving the country in the lurch and not doing its democratic duty to help ensure a working and stable government…

On the other hand, if the SPD comes out of its opposition shell and agrees to revisit a grand coalition with Angela Merkel’s Christian Democrats, it may well be accused of opportunism and lacking backbone.

The SPD doesn’t have any backbone, you see (that’s the FDP‘s job). So being accused of not having one is clearly out of the question. And if comes to new elections then? They get slammed even harder. Same personnel, same platform. Brilliant leadership there, Martin Schulz. I think we’ve got our German word for the day here and it doesn’t even need a translation: Kindergarten.

Fly The Friendly Skies

November 17, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Anti-Semitism, Arabs, Courts, German, Germans, Germany, Israel, Jews, Justice, Kuwait, Rulings 1 Comment

But not with Jew. I mean, you.

A court in the German city of Frankfurt ruled on Thursday that Kuwait Airways was within its rights to refuse to transport an Israeli because of their citizenship.

In its judgement, the court said it was “not reasonable” for the airline to transport a person if doing so risked severe legal consequences for its employees in Kuwait.

Kuwaiti law prohibits companies from doing business with Israelis.

Damn. Here come da judge. Just a little clarification here: This was a court in Germany today, in the year 2017. Not that you’re thinking it was one of those other kind of German courts from back in the day.

Die Airline darf israelischen Staatsbürgern die Beförderung verweigern. Das hat das Landgericht Frankfurt entschieden.

German Of The Day: Unfassbar

November 16, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Bundeswehr, Defense, German, Germans, Germany, Tanks 4 Comments

That means unfathomable or mind-boggling. And, well, actually, it isn’t.

Not at all. It is in fact not in the least unfathomable that of the 244 Leopard II tanks the Bundeswehr has at its disposal (244 tanks for an entire army?) only 95 of them are acutally, well, disposable. That’s, uh – let me do the math here – less than half.

What was I saying the other day about Germany living in a parallel universe (comments)? Do you believe me now?

Please note: These are also the same tanks that are Exportschlager. Another German word. This one meaning export hits. See how it all fits together (not)?

“Das ist unfassbar.”

Now That’s Putting It A Little Drastic

November 15, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy Tags: Alternative Energy, CO2, Coal, Electricity, Energy, German, Germans, Germany, Language Leave a comment

But wenn man recht hat, hat man recht. But when you’re right, you’re right.

Germany Is a Coal-Burning, Gas-Guzzling Climate Change Hypocrite.

Just this summer, German Chancellor Angela Merkel read U.S. President Donald Trump the riot act for pulling out of the Paris climate accord, chiding the United States for ignoring and perpetuating climate change…

Yet Germany’s image as selfless defender of the climate, which was once largely deserved, is now a transparent fiction. Germany has fallen badly behind on its pledges to sink its own greenhouse gas pollutants. In fact, Germany’s carbon emissions haven’t declined for nearly a decade and the German Environment Agency calculated that Germany emitted 906 million tons of CO2 in 2016 — the highest in Europe — compared to 902 million in 2015. And 2017’s interim numbers suggest emissions are going to tick up again this year.

Bundeswehr Showing More Transparency

November 12, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hype, Hysteria Tags: Bundeswehr, German, Germans, Germany, NATO, Officers, Trans, Transgender 1 Comment

Frustrated by the low number of women interested in becoming officers in the German army, the Bundeswehr has decided to once again lead from behind and has begun transitioning some of the few male officers it has (this is the German Army, after all) into the female kind.

Thought to be a transgression up until very recently, these officers, mostly active as translators or in the transportation division, will be transferred after transformation to the transnational and transcultural Transall troops currently stationed in Transylvania where they will study, among other things, transcendental meditation (this is the German army, after all).

Or so the transcript I’ve read. It was a transliteration, however. End of transmission already.

„Wir haben hier einen Frauenanteil von nur fünf Prozent.“

PS: The female officer in the picture is the big guy on the left.

Let’s Do The Math

November 10, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Brexit, Budgets, EU, German, Germans, Germany, Money, UK Leave a comment

Yeah, that makes sense. When Britain does it’s Brexit thing and leaves the EU the money they’ve been pumping into it all these years will stop coming in.

That means the remaining countries – like Germany – will have to make up for this. OK. Are you still with me here? Good. Now can you tell me why this is supposed to be a news item? You should have worried about this before you failed to compromise with them and let them get away in the first place.

Of the expected 10.2 billion euros that will be permanently missing in the EU budget after the Brexit, Germany will most likely have to come up with an additional 3.8 billion annually if the general conditions remain the same.

Von den voraussichtlich netto 10,2 Milliarden Euro, die im EU-Haushalt nach dem Brexit dauerhaft fehlen würden, müsste Deutschland bei unveränderten Rahmenbedingungen rund 3,8 Milliarden Euro übernehmen.

OMG We’re All Gonna Die

November 6, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Der Spiegel, Donald Trump, German, Germans, Germany, Hype, Journalism, Media 3 Comments

Again. And again and again and again already. This must be the one year anniversary special or something.

Here’s some more of that high-class and balanced Spiegel journalism we have all grown so accustomed to. Jeepers. How can anybody hyperventilate this long? Just a few key terms here will tell you all you need to know about this article (and you thought some folks got carried away with their tweets):

“moral emptiness”
“the erosion of American greatness”
“existential threat to the American Republic”
“nuclear brinkmanship with North Korea”
“erratic belligerence”
“frayed to the breaking point”
“like Britain’s perverse flight from the European Union”
“a blow-up-the-system mood”
“the ultimate provocateur”
“Trump’s ‘America First’ is a slogan of impeccable fascist pedigree”

“After a year of MAGA, it has become clear that a disaster is unfolding whose consequences for humanity and decency will be substantial.”

US-Amerika To Penetrate Germany Again Tonight

October 31, 2017 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Anti-Americanism, Cultural Imperialism, Culture, German, Germans, Germany, Halloween, Martin Luther, Polls, Protestantism, Reformation Day, Religion, Surveys Leave a comment

“They see it as just one more example of American commercial penetration*.”

Popular as it is, many people are vehemently against Halloween in their countries, whether it be religious objections or fears of cultural imperialism.

It may be a bit of both in Germany, where 48 percent of respondents in the 2017 YouGov survey said the spooky holiday is a U.S. import that displaces German culture. October 31 is Reformation Day in Germany, and commemorates the day when Martin Luther launched Europe’s Protestant Reformation.

So on that happy note, Happy Halloween everyone! Whatever holiday you might be celebrating tonight.

Fast 50 Prozent der Deutschen glauben, Halloween sei ein US-Import, der die deutsche Kultur gefährde. Fakt ist, dass der Brauch ursprünglich aus Irland stammt.

*Psst. Don’t spoil everybody’s fun by explaining that Halloween originated in Ireland.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

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