German Of The Day: Mogelpackung

That means deceptive packaging. And it’s not just in politics either, folks.

Deception

Lots of products get packaged deceptively over here, too. Take these chips, for instance. You get 25 grams less product for the same not-all-that-low price!

Can’t wait to see who wins “Mogelpackung 2016.” The competition never sleeps.

Zu dieser Wahl ruft die Verbraucherzentrale Hamburg auf, die das ganze Jahr über Beispiele für versteckte Preiserhöhungen gesammelt hat. Das Prinzip ist stets das gleiche: In einer Packung ist weniger drin, aber der Preis bleibt unverändert.

German Of The Day: Nafris

That’s short for North African men.

Nafris

And the police in Cologne “did good” on New Year’s Eve by aggressively questioning, detaining and expelling the roughly thousand (1000) North African men who came to Cologne’s central station to try to raise hell with German women again, just like they had done the previous year (Why are these multiple offenders still in Germany, you ask? Practically everybody else in Germany is asking themselves that same question these days, too.).

But the police in Cologne “did bad” by using the word Nafris, German Green women tell us. Because, well, that’s short for North African men.

Get it? Me, neither.

Am HBF werden derzeit mehrere Hundert Nafris überprüft. Infos folgen.

Misleading AND Unsettling

That’s what German agriculture minister Christian Schmidt thinks about food names like “vegetarian schnitzel” and “vegan curry sausage.” He even thinks that names like these should be banned because they mislead and unsettle the public.

Wurst

And I almost agree – those two names unsettle me, for one. Only what do you do about all those other weird traditional German food names out there already? You know, like Leberkäse (liver cheese – neither liver nor cheese inside), Teewurst (tea sausage – no tea), Bierschinken (beer ham – no beer), Baumkuchen (tree cake – no tree), Armer Ritter (poor knight – no knight, poor or otherwise) and Amerikaner (there sure the hell better not be any Americans in there!)? I mean, how misleading and unsettling is that? Let’s cut our loses and call the whole thing off, Herr Minister Schmidt.

Niemand dürfe „bei diesen Pseudo-Fleischgerichten so tun, als ob es Fleisch wäre“, forderte Schmidt.

Terror Fails In The Failed State Of Berlin

Nothing works here, you know. Think airport, or any of the other construction sites around town that have been built to last forever. Or try getting something done at your local Bürgeramt (no, that’s a “citizen’s office,” not a hamburger joint). And Berliners can boast about having a whole army of brilliant city planners and administrators who are known to have made their counterparts in Venezuela green with envy. And broke? Berlin is so broke that even the debt here is in debt.

Berlin

And yet, nobody seems to care. I don’t know if stoic is the right word, long-suffering is more like it, but Berliners just don’t care. Nothing really shakes them. So now we have the situation where even international terrorist types come up against a brick wall here (another Berlin Wall?). These ISIS or whatever-they-call-themselves-this-week guys are just going to have to come to grips with the fact that Berliners aren’t particularly terrorized by their terror. In fact, they remain “maximally unperturbed” by the attack here yesterday, as Spiegel Online put it. And that pretty much sums it up.

Sad, in a way. If it weren’t all so sad. That these guys are failures goes without saying but to fail in a failed state like Berlin takes a very special kind of loser. Talk about adding insult to injury. What Luschen (duds).

“Eure Stadt fühlt sich sehr ruhig an. Ist Berlin eigentlich immer so?”

German Of The Day: Vollspacko

That means “complete dumbass,” or something along those lines. And this guy below should know. When to use the term, I mean.

Vollspacko

“I only landed tenth place on Playboy’s Man of the Year! That’s nine places behind that complete dumbass Böhermann,” Till Schweiger wrote on Facebook.

And that, I think, is probably one of the most intelligent things I’ve ever heard Till Schweiger say.

„Beim Playboy bin ich auf auf Platz Zehn gelandet! 9 Plätze hinter dem Vollspacko Böhmermann.“

Our Facts Are The Facts

Post-factual world or not. And our truth is the truth, too. That’s how everybody else in the world out there – like us – sees it, right?

Facts

So truth be told, the fact is that, well, it is what we tell you it is, regardless of how you feel about it. So stop getting all emotional about things and just accept our facts as the truth and vice versa and, like, go with the flow already. Your eyelids are now getting heavy, by the way. Very heavy. You can only resist for so long. Honest. It’s a fact.

Asked about the rape-murder of a German student allegedly committed by a teenage Afghan asylum seeker and the recent arrest of a 31-year-old Iraqi asylum seeker over the sexual assaults of two Chinese students, Merkel urged Germans to stick to the known facts.

German Of The Day/Year: Postfaktisch

That means post-factual – and has just been selected Germany’s word of the year 2016.

Postfaktisch

“This awkward adjective describes the development in which public debates are defined more and more by temperament and feelings than by facts. This may not be a term used in everyday speech, the experts admit, but crucial here is that it reflects central events that have taken place this year – from Brexit to Trump.”

Das sperrige Adjektiv beschreibt die Entwicklung, dass öffentliche Debatten zunehmend von Stimmungen und Gefühlen und weniger von Fakten bestimmt werden. Dies sei zwar kein Begriff aus der Alltagssprache, räumen die Experten ein. Entscheidend sei jedoch, dass er zentrale Ereignisse des Jahres widerspiegele – von Brexit bis Trump.

German Of The Day: Angemessen

That means appropriate or suitable.

Angemessen

You know, like the appropriate or suitable compensation that the German government will now how to  pay to  the power companies it expropriated after the infamous (and ongoing) Fukushima Panic Attack of 2011?

Of course what this appropriate or suitable compensation will actually end up being once the non-atomic dust settles is quite another matter. Something tells me it’s going to be a whole lot. Hey, nichts ist umsonst. There is no such thing as a free lunch.

SPD-Vize Stegner gibt Merkel Schuld für Milliardenentschädigung.

German Of The Day: Multikulti

That means multiculti, as in multicultural. And this is a word that is suddenly “out” for Angela Merkel’s CDU, for some inexplicable reason.

Multikulti

But to compensate for the loss, Modernisierungsverlierer (modernization losers) is now officially “in” with them. And just in case you were wondering, we are once again moving into election season in Germany and these “losers” are the same ones who have helped parties like the AfD become “winners” in recent years. Sounds vaguely familiar somehow but I can’t seem to put my finger on it at the moment.

Im Entwurf für den Leitantrag, der beim Parteitag Anfang Dezember beschlossen werden soll, sprechen die Christdemokraten ausdrücklich jene Bürger an, “die sich als Modernisierungsverlierer sehen und derzeit noch bei populistischen Parteien von rechts und links ihre Zuflucht suchen”.

German Of The Day: Dingsda

That means thingamajig, doohickey or even what’s-his-name.

Dingsda

Anyway, Dingsda is visiting Berlin again today. For another “iconic” speech, I assume. As long as it’s his last one, von mir aus (as far as I care).

Am Abend landet er in Tegel und er bleibt bis Freitag in Berlin, was auch zu zahlreichen Straßensperrungen führen wird.